Biting toddler

Brittany - posted on 07/29/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My son is 2 1/2 and bites other kids. It mostly happens when he is in the nursery at church or being babysat. He never does it when I am around to discipline him. Its always with people who are not willing to discipline him any other way than time outs. We have tried that and it doesn't work. I'm afraid it will come down to biting him back for him to realize that biting hurts and not okay. But, all the kids he's bitten are afraid to bite him back. Its embarrassing and disappointing! I am afraid he may do real damage to someone. Any suggestions?

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Angel - posted on 08/01/2010

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It sounds like he is frustrated and unsure of how else to handle the "situation". Have you tried the Love and Logic technique? I did this with my 3 yr old after a full year of biting and several threats of him being kicked out of Daycare and it saved my life. I must have spent hours searching biting on the internet just to find a way to stop it!!! The Love and logic approach says..you stay very calm and show no emotions, however when he wants to play with you or a playmate after a biting episode, you calmly say, "I'm sorry, I can't play with you because you might bite me like you bit and that would really hurt me like it did " and then you walk away with no further discussion of the issue (for the night..unless of course he bites again later that same day). It will be tough on you but he will understand. After a few times of him not getting to "do something he wants" he will get it. My son is stubborn to say the least so it took about 2 weeks of this but he is bite free now. (It didn't hurt to remin him a "drop off" of each time..."No Biting, Use your words.") Good Luck and know that you are not alone here.

Cailyn - posted on 07/30/2010

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yeah, the older two haven't done anything to threaten the baby, they love on him. so i'm not sure if its because he's not mobile, and can't get into their stuff or what. i'm hoping it's a stage, because it's getting pretty bad with both of them! good luck with your son!

Brittany - posted on 07/30/2010

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Thanks, Cailynn! Its comforting to know that someone else is in the same boat. We have another baby coming in Dec. so it concerns me that he might bite the baby. But, that probably won't be a problem until he is old enough to challenge my toddler. I've tried the biting back too! And he doesn't seem to get it. Hopefully its a stage he will grow out of. Let me know if you find anything that works! Good luck!

Cailyn - posted on 07/29/2010

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i have the same problem. my two oldest, 3 and 22 months bite each other hard enough to leave bruises on each other. i bite them back in the same spots, but i quit doing that, bc nothing seems to work. i have no idea what to do! it's frustrating!

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