Child definace.

Sheryll - posted on 01/20/2010 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My son is 3 and a half and he has the worst mood swings.One minute he's happy next he is angry kicking and punching stuff and throwing toys around then he's crying.Its like he has split personality's or something and it can get really hard trying to get him to behave and do what I tell him too.Im get really tired of telling him to do something or not to do something over and over without getting angry with him and sending him to his room.I also have a 4 month old daughter.Anyone else find this with there child and does anyone have any tips to help.

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Crystal - posted on 01/22/2010

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My son does this too. I do timeouts, counting, and a spanking ONLY if absolutely necessary and he's doing something like hitting his great grandmother enough to actually bruise her because he didn't get his way. Most of the time I try to ignore tantrums and things.

If he's not overly verbal, it could be that he's frustrated he can't explain himself. I know with my son, he's not very verbal yet but explaining things to him, or working with him to figure out what's bothering him has greatly cut down on these kinds of behaviors.

I asked my grandmother and mom about it with him before, and they said it's just the ages. Terrible twos, terrifying threes. Grandmama had 5 to raise, and she said when she had just one, things were fine. When she had two, the oldest began acting up and doing more and more misbehaviors to get attention. Even reverting backwards to be more babyish and stopped talking. With three, she had two of them trying to get her attention. So it could be jealousy.

Sharon - posted on 01/22/2010

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Children can be so hard to sort out, is he verbal enough to answer you if you sit him down to ask what is bothering him? Another question might be, has this been going on for a long time or just since you had your baby girl? Could it be jealousy and he needs some special time that he knows is for him only? If it has been long standing, I agree, you should talk with your pediatrician about it, there are several things that come to mind, but I don't really want to burden you with unnecessary worries or fears. You might try writing down instances, and what events were happening around it to help when you talk with his physician. It may also reveal something to you of the nature of his outbursts. Good Luck and keep us posted.

Theresa - posted on 01/20/2010

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He could really have some sort of chemicla inbalance, something like ADHD or some depression. Talk to his doc and see if he has any ideas.

Kristie - posted on 01/20/2010

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i know most will probably disagree because of the time we live in, but spankings work. NOT beatings. a firm spank on the butt. we use a wooden spoon so that we dont have to hit hard. try it on your arm first. you will find that with even the slightest tap it will make your skin sting a little. this is better than your hand because you have to use your hand so much harder than the wooden spoon because it will not sting the same until more force is used. plus, your hands should be used for love, not punishment. a few whacks on the bare bottom WILL work as long as you are consistent. if you find him being down right defiant or throwing fits...its time for a spanking. spankings should not be used for every little thing. just the defiance and temper tantrums you are having so much trouble with. for other things, sitting him on his bed for a time works. you must be consistent with whatever you do though, if you are not, the child wins. if you say NO stick to your guns, dont give in. when they see they win by throwing fits, they will do it over and over. after discipline make sure to hug and kiss your child and tell them you love them and explain why you punished them. i have by definition one strong willed child. which means he wants to do it or die. but our terrible twos were not so terrible because his father and i used this method. sure there were battles, we just had to make sure we won and he didnt. and for the most part he is well mannered and listens very well. after you begin spankings, most times just us threatening to spank works and we do not have to actually follow through, but of course there are times when we do. i hope this helps.

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