Conflict of opinions

Michelle - posted on 04/09/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )

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Hey girls,



Our 3 year old occasionally says that she does not like either of us (my Husband or myself) my Husbands response to this is telling her, then get out of here if you dont like us, go find a new mommy and a new daddy... Go on. I have told him that I dont think that is appropriate for her, and he gets upset with me! Please help I dont know what to do and I think that it may have affected her emotionally! My Husband is a good dad it is just his mom used to do certain things to him and now he wants to use the same approach with our daughter... His mom is now an alcoholic (according to him she wasnt back then), so I dont really have too much faith in her practices.



Thanks Ladies,

M

2 Comments

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Amie - posted on 04/09/2009

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Oh that's nothing. Wait until they're so worked up and scream... I HATE YOU... as their going to their room for bad behavior. =)

We choose to mostly ignore it, the only response we've ever given is Ya we know.
Kids do and say these things for a bunch of reasons... my own for not liking their punishment for bad behavior, to try and get a rise out of us. It never works and your husband's way I don't agree with. My own hubby had parents that did things a lot like that too. He at least realizes how bad this is for kids. He still has self esteem issues because of certain things his parents have done.
It's best to ignore it, the more you ignore it the less they'll do it. There's no reaction and if kids don't get a reaction they see no point in continuing what they are doing. We did the same thing when my lovely in-laws and parents let their potty mouths slip in front of our kids. While it's hilarious to watch a little 18 month old go oh shit it's just not appropriate. We ignored this too (hold in our laughs for when we were out of eye and ear shot of the little ones) and they stopped doing it because they got no reaction. It'll pass though. Eventually. =)

Teyaka - posted on 04/09/2009

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Well, the "I don't like you" this is a lifetime event and something that is going to be said rather verbally or mentally throughout her like.



Now, I know one of my little brothers tell me this all the time. Instead of tellin him to get a new sister I tell him I don't like myself either. I'm teh president of the club and looking for people to fill the rest of the seats. I ask him if he wants to be my secretary or treasurer. That usually shuts him up.



She's sayin it to get a certain reaction from you. So you can either react or ignore. I say turn it into a joke. That way you are still showing her its just words that she doesn't really mean.

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