how can i stop my 3 year old having tantrums

Sarah - posted on 05/25/2009 ( 2 moms have responded )




aimee will shake and scream when shes told off,,,,to the point she'll make herself sick????? help advice needed please


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Linda - posted on 05/26/2009




We count to 10 together & take a deap breath (multiple times if needed).... this is for me as much as it's for her.

If this doesn't help, I pick her up & put her in her room so that she no longer gets any attention. I set a timer for 5 min & check on her. If she's still screaming, I set it again until she settles down.

I'm not an expert on this topic by far. Good luck.

Sarah - posted on 05/26/2009




Perhaps reduce the amount of un-expected things in her life. Routine is what toddlers love.

I have made my son a chart with 3 steps for everything we are going to do during the day. It has pictures of things like clothes/eating/bath/books/shopping/toys etc. So when we get up in the morning I put up the pictures of clothes (get dressed), food (eat breakfast), then what comes next so if we are going to the shops then the shopping cart picture goes up. He feels so much more in control of what is about to happen in his day that his tantrams have become fewer.

How old is Aimee? She might need a fair amount of warnings before she is told off. So give her a warning ie 1. "Aimee don't hit your sister." 2. "Aimee I will count to 3 and you must stop hitting your sister, 1, 2, 3" When you have told her twice then get down to her level and tell her what she has done wrong. Unfortuately she needs a consequesnce. Even if she vomits. This is life and when you do something wrong you get told off, even as an adult.

With my son I have to judge weather or not to use time out as a punishment as he gets so distressed that he wets himself sometimes. If its not an appropriate time ie. he is tired and he is going to wet himself then I move him away from the problem ie I put him outside in the back yard so he can cool off out there but still has toys. If he can "cope" with time out then that is where he goes. 99% of the time though after 2 warnings he stops and appologises.

Lastly make sure you're not frightening her when you tell her off. I know that when I am disaplined at work I feel to vomit. My boss makes me feel really intimidated. Put yourself in her shoes when your telling her off. If you can - and I know its hard, try and tell her off when you are calm and not worked up yourself.

Good luck with it all. Let us know if any of that works. =)

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