how do I get my 2 year old to sleep in his own bed?

Rachel - posted on 06/08/2009 ( 14 moms have responded )

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Any idea's on how to get my 2 year old sleeping in his own bed??



To get him to go to sleep I have to "sleep" next to him on the floor, when he starts snoring i get up and go to my own bed, but he wakes up 3 - 4 times a night and tries to get in our bed... I've become so sleep deprived that i don't even notice when he climbs in now. But because of this, my husband has taken up residence on the couch... Not cool...

We don't understand and have been to the doctors because Christopher developed a horrible habit of being able to vomit on cue... If we tell him to go to bed, he'll walk over to it and vomit... It means he gets to spend another 20 mins out of bed so i can clean it up... Doctors advice: Get more sheets and invest in a good washing machine... We even tried phenergan, turns out it has a reverse effect on our little monster and it's as if we gave him a shot of straight red cordial...

We are at wits end...

Any suggestions would be very helpful...

14 Comments

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Monica - posted on 06/17/2009

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My son is a little over 2 yrs old.He has never slept in our bed.He slept in a bassinet next to our bed for 1 week then we put him in his room. and when he was older and had trouble sleeping we let him do the cry it out routine. he started sleeping in the toddler bed at 17 months. we bought a race car toddler bed ,and he loved the bed. he has a night light and a fan on at night. we have a set schedule for naps and bedtime, he knows when tell him it's time for night night, he gives his daddy a hug and kisses ,then climbs in bed he pulls up his blanket. he still sleeps with a pacifer.and i kiss him goodnight.then i just shut the door .he sleeps about 11 hrs a night.now in the very begining we had to lock his door because he would not stay in his room. we unlock the door before we go to bed at night. but now he doesnt get out of bed until the morning , then he wakes us up. i wish i could be more helpful.

Rachel - posted on 06/11/2009

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thats how it happened with chris, he was such a good sleeper, i'd put him in his cot an dwalk away, no crying, just rolled over and went to sleep. Then all of a sudden he started with the vomiting we got so tired that it became easier to just put him in our bed till he fell asleep. That was our first mistake... Then my hubby started sleeping on the couch and i suggested we buy him his own big boy bed. Worked really well for a week but then we were getting up 3 times a night and i got so tired that i didnt notice when he was crawling in... Now when i try to put him in his own bed he vomits straight away and just crys and i end up sleeping with him on the floor or just not sleeping at all... Im soooo tired....

Kat - posted on 06/10/2009

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I love this post, thank you for asking! My two year old is going through the same thing. She slept through the night beautifully until about two weeks ago and now I can't get her to sleep in her bed and when I can, she's up at 2am and back in mine.

Adf0905 - posted on 06/10/2009

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I would definitely give it a try! My daughter went from waking up 4+ times a night to sleeping through the entire night!

Rachel - posted on 06/10/2009

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That is a fantastic idea... We had a bad night last night, i didnt allow him to vomit but i am one tired mummy today. Unfortunately Chris doesnt need to cry to vomit, he just brings it on up like it's a part of life... It's frustrating because i feel this cant be good for him but the doctor said he'll grow out of it when he learns he cant get his own way...

I cry when he cries which doesn't help the situation, it breaks my heart to hear him so upset... He's my baby boy and he always will be no matter what age he is...

He's just so precious.

I JUST WISH HE WOULD SLEEP!!!!!!!

Adf0905 - posted on 06/10/2009

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We were having the same problem. My daughter can also vomit on cue. I refuse to just let her cry it out or scream until she vomits....that's just not my parenting style. After months of trying various methods, the one that's working for us right now is having her bed in our room. Yea, she's still not in her own room, BUT....at least she's in her own bed! That's already an improvement. I plan on gradually moving the bed away from our bed until she can no longer see us, and once we hit that point I'll move the bed in to her room. So far, so good!

Caroline - posted on 06/10/2009

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I had exactly the same problems with my 2 year old son. I didn't think it was a big deal until I met my new partner, then it was time for Jamie to be in his bed so I could have some mummy time. I started by putting him in his big boy bed and laying down with him until he was asleep then I progressed to sitting with him until he was nearly asleep, then standing beside his bed and moving further away each time until I was standing in the doorway where he could just see me. He was comfortable with me giving him his kiss saying I love you will see you in the morning and leaving the room while he was still awake because he knew I was still close. After doing this for a while I started creeping downstairs and he didn't know any different. Now he gets in to bed has a kiss we say our goodnights and I leave him to fall asleep on his own. On the odd occasion he will play up but I just stick to my guns. It sounds like a long process but if you do it gradually you will be amazed at the results. I was also advised that as Jamie kept waking up through the night, when I go to bed I should disturb him (not wake him) then he body will believe he has already woken and he wont wake up, again that could take a few weeks to progress, but anything is worth a try when you are in your situation. Good luck and I hope you have some success in which ever route you take. If you need anymore help or advice please do get in contact.

Rachel - posted on 06/10/2009

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thank you soo much everyone, i'm willing to try everything, its just so hard coz sometimes i dont wake up and my husband does what he can but works three jobs. So he really cant do much... Please keep up the suggestions and i'll keep you posted...

Perla - posted on 06/09/2009

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Sometimes the biggest problems are solved with the simplest solutions. My 2 yr. old kept crying everynight saying she didn't want to go to sleeeeeeeep!!! and she made a huge fuss!!! every night until one night, out of the blue, I said "ok, don't go to sleep! just go to bed but don't go to sleep!! and she went straight to her bed, and after 5 min. fell asleep!!!!!!! nice! If I had known it would be so easy before!!! now whenever she says that to me, I answer the same way and it works! every night!!

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I have a two year old that I let sleep with me as well. I found that an easy transition tool, was to let her sleep with my blankets. I know it sounds pretty simple and like it wont work, but it did wonders. Your child has been used to you and your smell since the day it was born. The smell of mom comforts him. Because he is used to sleeping with you, he is used to your sheets and blankets and the smell of you next to him as he sleeps. Dress his bed in your sheets and blankets. Do it every night until he has been sleeping on his own for at least a few months. By the time your scent is completely out of the material (usually many wash loads), he will be sleeping on his own...possibly even for a while. Even if you have to incorporate other methods to try and get him to sleep by himself...this is one thing that you can do to give him comfort that you can be 100% consistent with no effort.

L - posted on 06/09/2009

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Ouch. I'm sorry for the sleep deprivation...I always feel for anyone who is sleep-deprived, it's awful. Here's my only suggestion - this is what worked for our 2 year old. We put a bed in her room (replacing her crib). And we would talk about it throughout the day. Saying it's a 'big girl' bed and 'you can sleep on it when you're a big girl.'. She was very intrigued by this and between that and potty training (which was also a big-girl thing), she really wanted to be a big girl. So we didn't let her sleep in her new bed at first. She really had to prove she was a big girl (which was simply her saying it over and over again). Then we'd explain "well, a big girl will sleep in her big girl bed and will stay there. If you get out of your bed - you're not a big girl yet...so are you sure you're a big girl?" She would insist she was. So when we finally let her sleep there, she was so happy that she could and that she was a big girl, she stayed and has left the bed on her own maybe twice in 4 months. Now she's so trained that that's her bed, she does get in and out, but only to get into bed and out of bed in the morning. It took patience on our part and really playing up the 'big girl' aspect. It worked for us!

Lynn - posted on 06/08/2009

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PLEASE...you have to be firm and provide the tough love. Put them there and leave them there. Say NO firmly adn let them know you have your bed and they have there. And you may have several nights of putting them back, but you have to do it. Stay consistent and stick to you guns...they will cry and fuss, but again, stay consistent and firm. It will work - I promise.

User - posted on 06/08/2009

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The way I moved mine from our bed to his own was very gradually. I slept with him for a week then it was Daddys turn, then Daddy slept on the floor in his room for a few days nearly a week. But he was co-slept and was sleeping through (til 4) when we moved him out just before he turned 2. For sleep time we have a good routine which when we are having any sleep issues we stick to like glue. We have dinner, bath, book a breastfeed, a cup of water and sleep. We all lay down together in bed to do the last 4, its a beautiful family time and doesn't usually take long for him to go to sleep about 10 mins. I highly recommend Elizabeth Pantley's No Cry Sleep Solution, and the Sears, Baby Book. Pantley helps you to identify any problems in sleep time routine by getting you to do a sleep diary on how a normal night at your house goes before bed time. Hope some of this helps to give you some ideas.

Eileen - posted on 06/08/2009

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I also hope that people will give good advise, my daughter will be 4 in NOv. and still comes to bed with us. Drives me mad.

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