How do you deal with terrible 2's

[deleted account] ( 6 moms have responded )

my daughter is closer to three but has always been very well behaved. the last few weeks she hasn't been listening and telling me no. i have tried time out and putting her in the corner, yelling or talking to her, taking away toys or tv, and nothing seems to work.

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Moni - posted on 07/06/2010

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I agree with giving (limited) choices and letting your kiddo help with chores, mine loves "helping" me sweep, vacuum, sort laundry, empty the dishwasher, etc. I've also really been enjoying toddlerhood, it's nice to have a mobile, communicating child!
We follow the techniques from Happiest Toddler on the block, using short, repetitive phrases, paraphrasing what they're feeling until they get that we understand her (it's a lot less complicated than I just made it sounds!) It has worked really well for us and tantrums have shortened in length and decreased overall. There are still days (like yesterday) that she apparently just feels the need to say no to everything and have a meltdown...I let her be and turned my music up, she was fine in a few :)

Stace - posted on 06/19/2010

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my little girl is also havin terrible 2s, elizabeth you should involve your little girl in stuff u do like doing the washin or puttin stuff in the dryer my daughter was avin bad moods like urs now ive involved with stuff i do shes more well behaved once shes finished the task il say draw mommy a picture this keeps her brain active if she dont listen give her a warning example tidy ur toys away if she dont listen place her on the bottom step off ur stairs go down 2 her level n explain why uve put her there then leave her there 4 2mins ( 1 min = 1 yr ov there age) then explain again what she did wrong then have a kiss n cuddle i seen this on super nanny and its sorted my daughter out she used 2 go nearly 10 - 15 times aday now shes onli bin on 3 times in past 3 days hope it help it works it did with mine.

Lyndsay - posted on 06/17/2010

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Honestly, I haven't found the twos to be all that terrible. He's much more fun now that he's no longer a baby, and I'm glad he's developing some independence. That being said, I think the biggest thing is to establish your role as a parent but still give your child some options. For example, if you want her to take a bath, tell her shes going for a bath. Don't ask her if she wants to, then get mad and force her when she says no. But do ask her whether or not she wants bubbles, what toys she wants to play with, and which towel she wants to use when she gets out. Also, giving her small tasks that will occupy her will help her feel like she's doing something important and really helping out... while getting her out of your hair for awhile.

Marcy - posted on 06/17/2010

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Are you giving her choices? At this age for them its about control. For example, if its time to take a bath I will tell my son "It's time to take a bath you can go now, or in 5 minutes when you are done playing with your cars." obviously he always goes for the 5 minutes but then its not a power struggle. if the 5 minutes are up and he refuses to go in the tub I turn off the tv, clean up his toys and sit on the sofa and wait for him to come to me. Its all about negotiation and making them feel like they have some control. There are days when this doesn't work....on those days nothing works though and I just kind of go with it.

This stage will pass. Just figure out how you want to handle situations like this and stick with it.

Diane - posted on 06/17/2010

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mm...i swat my son on the butt (not hard) then I make him sit on the time out chair or send him to his room. after he is done crying I ask him to do what i asked him to do again...lol i demand conrtol but my son is also well behaved too, =]

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