How do you discipline an 18 month old that throws tantrums and get mad when not picked up?

Montana - posted on 03/08/2010 ( 12 moms have responded )

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My 18 month old screams and cries when he doesn't get a bunch of attention or doesn't get picked up. This can be at home, the car, or store. I don't know what to do. I feel like it's something worth "punishing" so it doesn't get worse, but don't know what punishment is resonable for his age.

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Lorie - posted on 03/08/2010

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Well my son is 20 and I would go down to him and tell him I will hug you here but iam not going to pick you up.

If we were at home/ at someone elses home I would put him in time-out for a 1 1/2 mins b/c he is 18 months.

If we are at home I have a mat called the NAUGHTY MAT and if he was being naughty I would ask him if he needs to go there and if he kept it up I could put him on the naughty . It has to be away from everything thats going on or could be interesting. I have mine where the bathroom and the stairs meet so there is nothing fun or interesting to look at.

GOOD LUCK

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Laura - posted on 03/11/2010

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I have always just walked away if its at the store we leave no matter what I will also put my daughter in her room (she is 3 I started doing that at 2) and now that she can do her ABC's she recites them (to help her calm down) and then we talk about why she freaked out it seems to help we never had the terrible 2's and are trying to not have much of horrible 3's!

Lindsey - posted on 03/11/2010

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He is definately seeking attention. If you ignore the negative behavior he will eventually stop. Don't forget to reward him by holding him when he is calm or being a good boy. He just needs to know that you don't get what you want when you act that way. If you do this he will get over this hump quickly and he will be happier. Not to mention mom.

Caroline - posted on 03/11/2010

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I walk away and ignore them. Leaving the room worked for my 3. Just make sure all responsible adults do the same plan of action. Good luck! X

Shamera - posted on 03/10/2010

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Just ignore them. They want to get a reaction out of you thats why there throwing a tantrum. I ignore my kids when they start acting that way and as soon as they see your not paying them any attention they stop.

JOY - posted on 03/09/2010

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For my kids at this age I think it's important to ignore the tantrums and literally walk away and wait for the child to work it out on their own. In public, make sure that your child has something to do and is not expected to sit quietly with nothing to do. Discipline didn't work for my kids at this age, but redirecting to an acceptable behavior worked. I also think it's important to praise as much good behavior as possible and try not to focus on the negative. This is really hard to do, but it will pay off when your child is old enough to understand consequences amd is looking for your approval :)

Kathleen - posted on 03/09/2010

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tantrums well. when my son does it and he's 21m and starting doing it horribly I have to laugh at him. I know not the greatest tool but he quits quickly because i'm not giving him what he wants. Then again if you saw him you probably would laugh too. I do get down and explain why and that when we get home we can read a book or watch his shows if he has one. My son loves disney channel and nick jr. We'll watch it and talk and sing together. Just keep explaining to him why and don't pick him up if he throws the tantrum. I tell my sun if he wants to be picked up he has to "ask".

Jessi - posted on 03/09/2010

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i usually let my son cry it out at home. when in public we go to the car as soon as the tantrum starts then when he is finished we continue our outing. if it continues we leave and go home and he is left with a sitter. the main thing is to keep the punishments consistent and the parents must all be involved and on the same page

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Completely ignoring it is the best punishment. I use to tell my son, "I'll pick you up when you stop crying" and that's all I would say. Then I would ignore him until he calmed down. The reward was my attention once he stopped crying and he learned that it was the more appropriate behavior if he wanted his way.

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Ignore the behaviour it will gradually subside, My 17month old has been doing this off and on since she was 10months, we ignore her and well it has subsided.

Danielle - posted on 03/08/2010

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well i have found with my kids...the best way to avert ANY tantrum is to ignore my kids. it sounds mean but i would just not even look at them while they throw a tantrum. kids are looking for a reaction...good or bad. do not give them one. that might not work for every kid tho. simply say no and tell them if they don't stop they will be put in time out. no kid wants to waste play time standing in the corner. be consistent. it wont happen over night but if you keep with it...you will see results.

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