I need help!!!!!

Jeanie - posted on 01/15/2010 ( 3 moms have responded )




My three year old step-son continuously does things he knows he is not supposed to do. He does have adhd and I have never had to deal with this from my older children. Time out and talking does not seem to work, he will still repeat the behavior, sometimes within seconds of being talked to about it. I am at a loss on how to handle things without feeling like I want to scream!


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Jeanie - posted on 01/15/2010




He lives with us full time, his mother did have visitations up until the past three months. We received a call from family services saying that she tested positive for every drug they tested for. So we stopped his visitations with her until she is clean again. Part of the problem is the fact that he suddenly stopped seeing her. I do realize that. I am consistant with all of the disiplines I have been doing. I have taken away toys and and continued with time out. Your input does help alot and thank you for taking the time to listen. If anything I don't feel like I am alone in this.

Carolee - posted on 01/15/2010




Does he live with you or the other mom? If he lives with her, you need to talk to her about how she disciplines him, and what needs to change or not. If he lives with you, how strict and consistant are you with the time outs? Have you taken his favorite toys away for a day because of bad behavior? How long have you been trying the time outs?

Melissa - posted on 01/15/2010




Welcome to the chaos of a special needs child. My oldest has ADHD and she pushes every boundary and every limit about the same things I tell her No to over and over again. Some days I feel like I am going to loose my mind. It is ok to go into your room and scream into a pillow or take a moment for yourself and lock the bathroom door and have a good cry. It is hard with children with ADD and ADHD, their brains are always going and to make them stop, pay attention and really listen to you is hard. You will feel like your talking to a wall. Try taking stuff away, television time, playdates, toys... talking won't work the more you talk the less words they focus on and listen to. Time out seems like torture to them because 3 minutes sitting still is like 3 hours to them because their brain is off and onto a million different things by then. I will warn you, it will get worse before it gets better. It takes time to find a good regimen of medicine and for them to gain some self control and you will have many days when you wonder if there is any more patience left inside you.

teach him to breathe and you breathe too, focus on it. Breathe in, breathe out, and then try and explain what he is doing wrong, do it in the quietest room with NO distractions. No TV going and no toys. ALWAYS be consistent. Don't punish him 1 day and not the next for something. Hope this helps.

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