I need some advice please

Jennifer - posted on 07/21/2010 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I don;t know what to do??? my son is almost 3 and he's talking back alot...for example: i'll say elijah please don;t do that and he will answer...NO im gonna do that!! or Elijah please don't talk back...he says ya im gonna talk back. I do time outs and it works most of the time but sometimes he will be on time out and still keep yelling at me and talking back. I don't want to spank my child but I have some people telling me that I need to spank him on the bum...I just can't do it and I dont know what else to do???

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Nina - posted on 07/23/2010

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I agree with the ignoring advice...children (any age) say and do things for a reaction. They don't get a reaction they will stop the behavor. And when he doesn't talk back or sits in time out quietly make sure you make a big deal about it "I am so proud that you were quiet" "You are being such a good boy" "Since you didn't talk back or whatever the situation do you want to go play together with ...(whatever his fav activity is)"

Debbie - posted on 07/23/2010

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My daughter is ... well, she's spoiled by almost everyone. She's known to throw temper tantrums when she's not getting her way. I've had to follow it up with taking her upstairs to her bedroom, putting her in her bed, telling her that I'll be back up to get her when I hear that she's quieted down and we can talk, then I close the door and go downstairs. In the beginning she would scream about it for quite awhile. Now just threatening to take her upstairs until she's calm seems to calm her down rather quickly. I think it helped to take her away from anyone that could give in to her or even hear her screaming. I have to keep telling my husband and the kids to not give into her all the time just because she's crying or screaming. They are reinforcing that that behavior works to get what she wants ... but they don't quite listen to me. She's sometimes mean with them but at least she knows that she can't get away with it if I'm around or with me (generally).

Mary - posted on 07/21/2010

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My 3 year old gets loud with me too. I look her square in the eyes and say, it's not nice to be mean. She has never gone past that point, and follows up with an apology.
Good luck mom, it'll get better.
PS, we are also a "no-violence" family.

Tisha - posted on 07/21/2010

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Try to just keep calm and repeat "Elijah, you are not going to get out of time out if you keep yelling at me" "you will stay there until you can be quiet"
CONSISTANCY!!!!!! I have 4 children, ages 13, 16, 19 and 23
Hope it helps

Samantha - posted on 07/21/2010

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hes doing it for attention he knows hes testing your boundaries its a stage they go through many !! try to ignore it and look away or pretend your not listening good luck

[deleted account]

You could try restarting his time out when he makes noise during time out. Or even take something away (fav toys, tv time, a dessert, an outing, etc...) if his time outs have to be restarted again (like if you restart it twice you take something away for 24 hours)

[deleted account]

I tell my son (he's 3 1/2) that he is not allowed to make any noise during a time out. The purpose of a time out is to sit quietly and think about what you did that was wrong. If he is making noise then I tell him that he has to be quiet by the count of 3. If he doesn't stop then he has to go to his room and lay in his bed for 10 minutes.

Jen - posted on 07/21/2010

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take his most fav toy off him go n put it in the bin make sure he sees u but sneakly put it somewhere out of sight not the bin really. till he starts doing as he is told. cruel but wrks

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