Is my 22-month-olds behaviour normal??

Emma - posted on 06/30/2011 ( 10 moms have responded )

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I have a 22-month-old son. He's a lovely little boy and isn't aggressive or nasty towards other children. Sometimes he will give a little shove or a gentle tap but he does not hit, kick or bite and never has. He goes to a number of playgroups a week so he can interact with other children and also goes to a private nursery. The problem I have with him is this. He is very hyperactive and will often race around laughing and screaming at the top of his lungs. Once he is out of him pram or out of the car he's off. He will run anywhere and everywhere, even when we go out shopping. It is almost impossible to go for something to eat as, once he's been fed, he wants out! Once he is out, if he attempts to go somewhere or on something I won't allow him on he will go into a complete mental-breakdown, throwing himself on the floor, kicking, screaming and just causing a general nuisance. He can be very embarrassing when we are out in public. My main worry is for myself as I look a lot younger than I am (I am 23 but look about 15!!). I can sense people are looking at me thinking that I have failed as a mother and my son is an unruly rebel! He will start to take things out on me, running up to me and slapping my leg (not hard) and will shout and point at me (as I do to him which he has obviously copied!). When I attempt to pick him up he will slap me or throw his head back which usually gets me in the chest! I do have the naughty step in force at home and that seems to work but so far it is failing when out and about as he is far too distracted by others around him.

My main worry is that he is not 'normal' and that his behaviour is worse than others his age. He always seems to be the ONLY one misbehaving! Where your children like this at that age? Should I be concerned about his amount of energy? Could this be a contributing factor? I worry that he is beyond normal hyperactivity and is bordering on ADHD at times!!

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Lilliana - posted on 07/01/2011

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Don't worry Mama's my son did the same thing! Here is what I did. The reason your kids do this is because they have figured out that when they run and go nuts like that, you chase them catch them and the whole time they are ettin your undivided attention! That's all it is, attention!! Here is what I suggest take your toddlers somewhere safe and where you feel comfortable (your parents house) an empty restaurant) and this is what you do, engage your baby- bring a coloring book or a games and give them undivided attention make them giggle, or even nurse them (if you still are), then when your toddler goes raging around ignore him or her, don't chase don't yell don't threaten don't even look. Guess what? He or she will get bored quickly and when it's all over bring your toddler back to the table and give him or her more attention. Our kids are smart, smarter than we give them credit for! They learn quickly! :-) hope this helps!

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Selena - posted on 07/04/2011

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I don't think there is anything wrong with your son besides the fact he needs a good spanking. He does these things and acts out because u allow it. My children know well better than that. Now as far as the spanking is concerned yes I do spank my kids, But only when truly needed. I am not a person who was spanked as a child but I also was not a child who misbehaved. I also knew better than to try my parents. My children know the same. They know better than to embarrass my like that. When I say No then it's No. I would have took him right in the bathroom where ever we where and spanked his butt. Who's the parent you or him? You need to take control of the situation and brake him outta that, cause the next thing you know he will be disrespecting you on a whole other level when he gets older. Then what you gonna do? I hate when I see a mom out some where and there kids are kids are going crazy on the floor or even sometimes I have even seen kids hit there parents. I just SMDH . Its just crazy to let a child run you like that. If you don't believe in spanking that's fine but you need to find a way to take control of the situation and let him know who the adult is!!!!

Emma - posted on 07/03/2011

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Thank you all so much for your comments! It makes me feel so much more comfortable to know that others behave the same as mine! I have just ordered that book along with the new Jo Frost one. On a positive note, when we go to church on a Wednesday and he runs around he used to be the only one and I'd get very embarrassed (the vicar assured me that he did not mind him racing around, he was just glad that he was there!). Well, last Wednesday we met a lovely little boy who befriended my son and they are both as manic as each other. If you can't beat them, join them :)

User - posted on 07/02/2011

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Hi, I am the grandma of a two year old boy. WOMAN, your child is fine and the look those people are giving you is either a knowing look because they have been there before or they are saying better her than me. Don't let other people affect they way you live if you want to go to a restaurant try making it one with a child friendly atmosphere. Your day will come; or you could occassionally hire a sitter.

Karli - posted on 07/02/2011

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Hello, My son was/is the exact same way. I found a book titled raising a spirited child by Mary Sheedy Kurcinka. You can google spirited child and see if he fits some of the personality traits. It really helped me understand my extreme energy kid and how to cope with and teash him how to cope as well.

Mary - posted on 07/02/2011

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Oh my gosh this is my life.... My son seems to act the same way... If he don't get his way he throws himself in the floor screaming and crying.. He smacks at me also... I think it is just the at the age of what is called the terrible twos. Or at least I hope so and hopefully it will pass. My friends tell me it will. The dr. says to ignor the temper and it will pass. but that is so hard sometimes. I hate taking him places somedays... But I know if I quite than he will continue to do this just to not go certain places or get to come home sooner... At first at church when this happened I just packed up and came home... but he liked that too much... So now we have to go outside for "TALKS"... sometimes this works, sometimes we have to go out 2-3 times... I am praying he grows out of it soon... Thanks for your comment... I was wondering the same things...

Pauline - posted on 07/02/2011

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I am going the same thing and mine is only when we go to the playing grounds. No problem when we go out eating or shopping. A little melt down at church but not that much. I feel embarrassing b'se she will make this high pitch voice and hit all the way home.

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Let me tell you, my son is 21 months and he acts the exact same way! Do not think for a second that this is not normal because it completely is! Let me assure you that though it feels like it, no one is looking down on you or thinking that you can't control your child, especially if they are mothers themselves. Boys will be boys! My son has a lot of energy all day long too and he also throws his head back when I pick him up. Energy is a great thing at this age! He is active, healthy, and full of life! I wouldn't worry about ADHD at all, this sounds like typical 2 year old boy behavior.

Rebecca - posted on 06/30/2011

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My little girl is almost the same way. I HATE GOING OUT TO EAT NOW! Lol it is almost impossible. She doesn't want to be contained in anything, when I try to go to the grocery store she is trying to stand up and hop out or the cart. She also tries to run around and yell. Honestly, I think this is pretty normal because we are really active with her at home, We're always running around the house, taking her outside and just running and having fun all the time. I think that it is difficult for her to seperate those two types of play, and when she gets in public she gets excited and wants to play. My little girl is 19 months old so I'm pretty sure it's just a phase. It has been getting much better though, I must say. But for the last 3 months I pretty much didn't want to leave the house, so I do feel ya on this one. What's been working for us is pulling the big girl card, telling her that if she wants to be a big girl who pees on the potty and drinks from regular cups that she doesn't get to act this way. I pick her up and baby cuddle her (which she hates) which also has helped to stop it.

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