Is my husband and I bad parents for letting our 4 year old watch more than 2 hours of tv daily?

Jordan - posted on 10/23/2010 ( 34 moms have responded )

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My son stays at home with me and I have a pre school curriculum I teach him. He knows his shapes, numbers to 20 in english, french, and spanish, he knows how to read around 500 words or more, he knows all his colors, his vowels, right and left, knows how to tie shoes, knows what traffic signals mean, knows his birthday, month/day/year, knows his address and phone number, seasons, months, how many days are in a year, almost knows all parts of the bible; (daily scripture readings), can write his name and about 15 other words quite well, symbols from different cultures, art history, some science: insects, arachnids, mammals, amphibians,etc., he knows there are 24 hours in a day and we are currently working on telling time and using am and pm. I'm not a teacher or anything, but I enjoy teaching him. He's so quick to pick up things, I think he's the smartest kid ever, but is this normal for a four year old? I just don't know. I get a lot of horrible looks from moms when they find out how much tv he watches. He has a desktop computer and a dell laptop that he uses to practice computer skills such as typing his name, key functions, using the mouse steadily, creating passwords and entering it in correctly, opening tutor pre k games, stuff like this. I make things fun for him, so he loves to learn. I taught him some sign language when he was 7 months old and he used this until he was 16 months because he had a speech delay, but now I guess i just want to know if he is behind or if he's right where he needs to be. My family says he should be tested for the gifted but you know how families are, they are biased. What are your opinions?
Thanks

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[deleted account]

I'm ALL over myself - no worries! These types of threads just come across as being ostentatious. They're annoying and I don't believe she's actually seeking real help. I think she just wanted to brag. Hmmm....just MY opinion though.

Jocelyn - posted on 10/26/2010

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Lol Dana I found it on youtube; so now we can see it right here on COM :P

[deleted account]

I don't either. You can't post on a public forum and expect everyone to agree and pat you on the back. I'm allowed to have a difference of opinion and I'm allowed to be skeptical and just like everyone else, I'm also allowed to voice my opinion.

AND, maybe Jordan should look around and think about reevaluating her situation because I'm sorry but she comes across a certain way and perhaps she doesn't realize it. At least I KNOW I'm a bitch.

Dana - posted on 10/28/2010

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I actually didn't care when you said it was bitchy, maybe that's the difference.

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Vicki - posted on 10/30/2010

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Nope you're not bad parents. TV and other screens aren't ideal but I can't pretend for a second that my boy never watches! This last couple of weeks he's seen even more than normal. I'd prefer him to play outside but we're in an apartment so I can't just let him outside (he's only 16 months) while I do housework.

Sashanna - posted on 10/30/2010

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i think you are doing a great job if you are able to teach your son those things at such a young age i am having a hard time getting my four year old to pay attention long enough but i started to realize thaat he is actually getting it i was so happy he is a very smart boy and has large vocabulary for his age and it drives me in sane but that is who he is needles to say you are his mom and you know your child more than anyone else and as long as he is having fun if TV is what he chooses and you are monitoring what he is watching then he is fine you will know when he is missing something because that voice inside will tell you ignore the negative remarks and listen to constructive ones but listen to your child

Curi - posted on 10/29/2010

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i have the TV on cartoons all day long. they are all teaching her things like ABC's counting, etc. However, she does NOT sit down all day and watch it. some things she will get glued to and most other things on tv she could care less about and she plays around the house for the rest of the time. of course she is only 19 months so her attention span is ZERO but she is still very smart, not using many words, but she understands commands and stuff. Between 4 years old and almost 2 is a big difference but if your child is on track for their skills i dont think it matters to do something they enjoy. I mean i got so bored sitting in school for 12 years from 7 to 3 weekdays, i didnt want to do homework because i learned all day, i wanted something fun too. and still do! but now its different cause i like learning about what im going to school for. Too much TV, like sitting the child infront of the tv and thats it is horrible and lazy but if he/she wants to watch a little bit of tv out of their day i dont see a problem, no matter what age. i have no idea about a 4 year old being behind or ahead, but he actually sounds like he knows A LOT! of course my daughter does know anything compared to your son she is also younger. If someone told me their child watches 12 hours of tv i woudl think thats rediculous but its their kid. if you use tv as a baby sitter so you can do whatever you want that is wrong to, but your not. you spend time with your child as do i, unless she is napping then i dont bug her. i dont see why a little tv is wrong, unless your amish.

Emily Jane - posted on 10/29/2010

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omg how ridiculous this post has gotten! Jordan just asked a question not to be hounded by a bunch of bored women! jesus!
Jordan, you dont need to ask whether this is okay or not..your doing a fantastic job by teaching your son while hes at home..and for a 4 year old he seems quiet advanced for his age!
im a stay at home mum too and my sons 3...we do learning time..almost the same as whatyou do but becides the french...he gets his tv time throught the day and some before bed time too...its not like you waking up in the morning and shoving him infront of it all day...and i say do put him through the gifted programe...your son sounds like he thrives on learning and is really enthusiastic about it
:)

Corinne - posted on 10/28/2010

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I just think it's rude to post on someone's thread, if all you are going to do is question whether what they're saying is true and then have a dig. You didn't like it when I said it was bitchy, would you like it if I called you a liar? And maybe Jordan was feeling a little pissed that she's working her nuts off and people still criticise and wanted to vent, does she not have that right, same as you? My point of view. :)

Jennifer - posted on 10/28/2010

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UM for a 4 year old, I'd say he is ready for 2nd grade!!! Really he knows more than most kindergardeners!

Dana - posted on 10/27/2010

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Corinne, I believe some of the accomplishments are possible, do I believe all of it, no. I don't think that means I'm bitchy or that I need to get over myself.

Corinne - posted on 10/27/2010

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And yes the video is funny, but it sounds like some of you ladies are being quite bitchy. You don't believe some of the accomplishments? Why? Cause someone else' child might be gifted or advanced? Get over yourselves.

Corinne - posted on 10/27/2010

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I have a 4yr old who is on the same page, she's been in school 6 weeks and is answering questions for children 2yrs ahead of her, simply because I took the time to teach her. Don't feel bad for letting him watch tv. The only reason my kids only have 1hr per day is because I suffered with Epilepsy as a child, and the constant flicker, especially from cartoons, still messes with my head. This is also why I don't have them on the computer, plus a lot of school work is done on a computer over here (England) and I am focusing on her actually writing things. So, no, you're not bad parents. :)

Dana - posted on 10/27/2010

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Nope. I don't think they even fully read the OP because I'm having a hell of a hard time believing it. A four yr old who knows the whole bible or even the rest of the "accomplishments"...sure. ;)

[deleted account]

How come no one is commenting on the video? People really don't read other people's responses do they? Ugh.

[deleted account]

Actually he probably won't be put in the gifted class unless he was born later in the year. I have the same issues with my 3 girls. All are "advanced" so to speak but it is mainly because we love to teach them. Yes they watch more than 2 hours of television a day but each of our girls are working well about other kids their ages. In the united states more kindergarteners get taught their colors, shapes, numbers to 20, alphabet, and starting to learn how to write. IF you keep going with your son he will be ready for 1st grade when starting kindergarten. No, in the united states children in public school MUST go to kindergarten first. We decided to homeschool for that reason after 2 years of our oldest learning nothing from school and actually being a teachers helper all her for both years. Your child is normal. He does and learns things just like any other child does and because you make it fun he loves it and learns more. I would suggest looking into homeschooling or private school to see if that would be a better fit for your son.

good luck and god bless.

Melinda - posted on 10/27/2010

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From what you have posted I would say the dirty looks you're getting from other parents is out of pure jelousy. Sounds like you have a very bright child and you're a good mom and great teacher and in large part responsible for everything he knows how to do. Computer skills are especially important.

Erin - posted on 10/27/2010

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He seems very smart to me. I bet he's smarter than the kids who's parents are judging you too.

Laura - posted on 10/26/2010

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It sounds like your doing all the right things with your child and he is working hard so let him have some fun also.

Juanita - posted on 10/26/2010

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OMG!!!!! Do not even waste your time worrying what other people thinks! It sounds to me that your son is more advanced than the average 4 year old. As long as he spends time playing outside doing what 4year old kids do I think the deserves at least 2 hours of tv a day as a reward for being such a amazing little boy!!! I am sure you don't allow him to watch rubbish anyway.
Juanita Duncan

Amy - posted on 10/24/2010

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My daughter is pretty much the same way. She loves to learn. Even stands on her stool with me and makes her own eggs in the morning because she really enjoys cooking. It's fun to watch them learn. But there are times when momma just has to do chores that they just can't help with. That's when we pop in a movie. It's a break from each other and is usually an educational show. She does love her sign language and Signing Time is usually playing here. But, yes sometimes we let her watch more than two hours. Granted it isn't every day, but we do at times. My 18 month old watched a little einstein in the morning while we make breakfast so he stays out of the kitchen and away from the stove. He speaks as clearly as some 3 year olds. If kiddos are learning and happy, that's all that matters.

Michele - posted on 10/24/2010

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Sounds gifted to me. Can you share what preschool program you used? We would rather teach our daughter than to send her to preschool. She will be three end of next month.

Ilene - posted on 10/24/2010

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You are a very ambitious mom. My daughter has the t/v movies on all day but she doesn't just sit and watch them for the most part it is background noise. she learned her shapes and colors from watching t/v, learned most of her animals from it too. I think as long as thats not all they do then it is fine. Its when the sit there all day not getting any excersice that isn't good. You sound like great parents

Dawn - posted on 10/24/2010

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All of what you said sounds pretty normal IMO (I don't have a 4 year old but my mother taught preschool) for a child who's Mom works closely with him....they are little sponges!! You are doing a great job with him!! I would hesitate on testing him and just continue challenging him and making learning fun. As far as TV goes, it sounds like it isn't negatively affecting him intellectually, but you didn't mention his activeness or behavior....are people worried he isn't getting enough active play or that he is acting defiant?? If he gets enough outside play and isn't having behavior issues, who cares how much TV he is watching, IMO. Only you know when soemthing isn't working because you have to be with him all day!!

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