My 15mo.old has just started tantrums (kicking,screeching,hitting)Whats the best way to handle this?

Samantha - posted on 07/17/2009 ( 13 moms have responded )

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My son has just started screaming bloody murder at bed time, time out, when he doesn't get what he wants. He's also hitting and seems like he has a horrible temper. What is the best way to handle this, it's so frustrating.

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Jessica - posted on 10/04/2010

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When my son acted like that (he's now 7) I often just had to leave the room. Nothing I was doing was working so I ignored the behavior and he would usually stop because I wasn't giving him the attention and reinforcing the bad behavior. If my son was in a full-blown tantrum I would turn my back and do something else and pretend he wasn't there until he calmed down. Once he calmed down I gave him lots of hugs and kisses and told him what a good boy he was. Every child is different and what works for one might not work for another. Try it and see.

Cathy - posted on 10/03/2010

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mine is about that age and started too. I can usually tell that he wants SOMETHING that I am not able to figure out and it upsets him. Sometimes I distract him but not always b/c he is a twin so I have my time split with another 14 month old. I have tried to lay him on a soft floor and walk away for a while until I have the time to address him again. I find that at bedtime or nap time when I just go through the regular routine that he eventually calms down but other times he is off the charts. Tonight I gave him a popsicle to distract him and get him started eating...I think he was hungry but wanted to play and that upset him. The popsicle got him past the fit....have no hard advice but wanted you to know you are not alone and sometimes it just IS like this for a while. Oh, and I also praise the good behavior...when he is gentle, and does cooperate well...he is starting to understand and respond to that a bit more. Good luck!

Krista - posted on 07/20/2009

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What I've noticed that works is time outs. Is he too young? I don't think so. Pick a corner of your house for your child to sit in. He WILL get up and get out of the spot that he's sitting in, but you just have to keep putting him back and make sure you let him know WHY he's there. Sooner or later, he'll get tired of fighting and stay where he's supposed to. At which time you tell him why he was put there and that you need him to say sorry.

Kate - posted on 07/20/2009

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My 14 month little girl has started with the same after being such a laid-back baby! We do the same; put her or hold her somewhere safe and ignore her behaviour. I sometimes start reading one of her favourite books out and look as if I'm having a load of fun and she gradually comes over to join me. Then she gets a big cuddle once shes joined in. Repeat the mantra "its just a phase, its just a phase..."

Gemma - posted on 07/19/2009

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Mine is 17 months and is beginning to have tantrums. We ignore or distract the crying tantrums. If she starts hitting she gets put in her room, and as soon as I go back in to pick her up she is all cuddles and we just go on. I also find keeping a patient tone of voice helps me! Although after a hard day, my husband knows how bad the tantrums ave been because I start doing my strained and patient voice on him too!

Melissa - posted on 07/18/2009

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Stearnly say no and put him in time out against the wall, they understand because they will smille thinking its a game but be consistant. one min. per year age. it has been working with my 16 mo. old and i dont feel bad for spanking because that doesnt work

Patricia - posted on 07/18/2009

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My 10 month old is testing the waters with tantrums. Very minor. I ignore them and they go away. I am expecting it will be more challenging each month. especially if she does it in public.

Elizabeth - posted on 07/17/2009

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And too we have to realize that this is a tough time for them. They are learning about all the emotions and to deal with them. Pus they are at the stage when they are trying to communicate with us and they aren't completely sure how to do it! So it can be hard for them when they are trying to tell us something and we aren't getting it:)

Keri - posted on 07/17/2009

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I do think that by ignoring the tantrum, although sometimes embarassing for you, you are teaching them that the tantrum gets them nowhere, and they don't really acchieve anything. They're still so young and having to cope with all these new emotions, as well as not knowing how to handle themselves when they know what they want but are restricted...we will all be fine lol, if a little stressed sometimes!!

Elizabeth - posted on 07/17/2009

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I too am going through the same thing. My son (14mos) has also been doing tantrums. And it is new for me. My daughter (3) never did this; so I have no idea on what to do. The only advise that I have been given is to ignore it. And I do see that if I do ignore it he goes on to something else. While he throws himself on the floor, head down & kicking he will look up and see if anyone is watching and if no one is paying attention he gets up and plays or asks for something to drink or eat. So maybe it is something that will pass when he realizes that he doesn't get anything when he acts that way. So I guess we need to be patient & stick to our guns....hopefully it is a phase that will soon pass :)

Keri - posted on 07/17/2009

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Hey..I have an almost 2 year old lil girl, & the way wee deal with her tantrums is just to ignore her and pay her no attention while she's having a meltdown. If she throws a tantrum I just sit her down, or lay her if I think she's going to throw herself backwards, and stand next to her, not looking at her just for a few seconds really, and when she starts to calm down, I stoop down to her level, pick her up so she's standing, and say we don't hit, that's not nice...when I first started doing this, she started screaming again when I went to pick her up, so i would sit her back down and try again a few seconds later (about a minute or less), but now she understands a bit more, so we finish her paddy with a cuddle, and now she's almost 2, I tell her to say sorry if she's hit anyone, and then we forget it. Carry on playng in a really over the top voice and excitement so she's getting positive attention, rather than lots of attention that almost rewards the tantrum while she's having one. I hope this helps you, good luck xx :)

Samantha - posted on 07/17/2009

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Also kicking very hard, I'm strick and say no, same with my boyfriend but our tactics just aren't working.

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