My daughter is 2 years old with such an attitude. Believe me it's not the terrible 2's. What can I do to make her show respect to me and others?

3 Comments

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Stacey - posted on 12/23/2008

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i agree with the first reponse you got, your child will only do this if she is allowed to do so , she needs to have set routine and rules and if she doesnt abide by them then she must be punnihsed, . if your daughter is rude to you or others or dissobeys your ruls then you need to show consistency and explain her behaviour is unexeptible and will not be tolerated, the naughty step usually works make her sit there for 1 minute for every year of her life, and think about what she has done, after this get her to appologise and then start again, reward charts are also a good way of children of a young age learning to stivk to rules and being praised whne they do follw the rules , let her stuick her own stickers on the chart , and when she is behaving badly expain to her they she will not get a sticker, if your daughter sticks to the rules a small treat once a week shoudl make her want to dot he smae the next week , x

Rebecca - posted on 12/22/2008

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I guess the first question you should ask yourself is, "Why is she acting like this?" Are you consistent and follow through with your punishments? I'm sure she is just testing her, and your, limits. When my daughter was two, she was sooooo mean! She is 5 now and is very sweet and loving, with the occasional attitude. She will grow out of it, as long as you are consistent. You can always try time out, 1 minute for every year she is. Ignoring her "fits" is hard, but effective. Don't be afraid to tell her no, no matter how loud she cries. And the most important advice I have...love her, love her, love her! Good luck!!!

Uyen/Winn - posted on 12/22/2008

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It may take time and maturity. (I have a spitfire at home myself and she is downright belligerent.) You can model what you expect her (aka Darling) to do, how to be and act. Give her responsibilities and expect her to meet them.

For example, if she wants milk, every time she wants it, you tell her "Darling, you must ask 'May I have milk please?'" She may be able to say only "Milt pwee?" but she will have heard you say that phrase again and again. Hand her the milk only when she looks at you and acknowledges by words, word-like mumbles, or even pre-speech babble. When she "gets" what is expected of her, then she gets the object she asks for. Then praise "Nice asking. I appreciate that." Hug, kiss, pat. Go all Oscar-worthy with praise.

When you hand it to her, you say "Darling, you say 'Thank you Mommy'". And she may only say "Yang yew, mama."
But she will come to understand that she must ask politely, and graciously say thanks for your effort. Again, bring on the Golden Globes Best Actress performance "You are so welcome. Nice manners Darling!"

And when she's done with her milk, you say "Darling, after you're done, you must bring it and put it away right here." And she will fuss or forget the first 50 times, but she will learn responsibility and one day, it will be automatic. Use hand-over-hand if you need.

Do this every time for everything. It's the opposite of catering. It's a mindful way of teaching responsibility, give and take, and setting expectations.
She will rise. And you will have earned that respect.
And she will do this for other adults and children as well. Start today. And be consistent.

The number one compliment I get on my 2 boys and girl are on their respectfulness, politeness and manners. Teachers remark that they are the only kids that not only say "Thank you", but they say "Thank you, Mrs. so-and-so." They're the first ones to greet the teachers. (I teach them to greet their Dad when he gets home. The kids have to stop playing the Wii or chasing each other, to stop and welcome their father home adn then they may continue with their activities. So this lesson carried on to the school setting.)

They are but 2, 4, and 6. I give them all responsibilities. I send my youngest with a plate (paper) of food to give to her brother.

Even when I'm in the other room, I will hear this:
Handing over the plate, Hayley 2: "Here you doh Noah."
Noah 4: "Oh, thank you Hayyee."
Hayley: "Yor weltome."
Noah hollering over to me: "Thank you Mom for my breck-tis (breakfast)"
Me: "Your welcome, Noah. Nice manners."

It wasn't always this way. Prior to this, I had to repeatedly interject with "Noah, you must say 'thank you Hayley' when she gets something for you" and then "Hayley, say 'you're welcome Noah'". All day, every day.

She's 2.5 yrs. old and when I hand my daughter her milk, she says "Thank U mama for my milt."

Good luck. :)

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