Normal?

Amy - posted on 11/29/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My three-year-old is suddenly saying "I can't go to school." (daycare) We have never had a problem before. Is this a normal stage they go through? It has been going on for about 3 weeks.

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Valerie - posted on 11/29/2009

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i would get c urious...what is it about school? how come you can't go? perhaps someone said something that has led him to believe he doesn't qualify...it happens...if he has to go to school then remind him that he has to go and ask what would be helpful...what would make going to school be better...if he gives you something to work with then do it...if not let him know that won't work and ask what else will be helpful...try to let him come up with the solution but if he can't then perhaps offer a few choices...wait to see if he gives insight or answers first...more powerful and long-lasting than when we fix, protect anbnd rescue to soon...

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I would talk to his teacher to see what is going on at school. Ask that she call you at her convenience or perhaps you could go in early one morning to speak with her. If there are new teachers in the room then it may be that he is getting use to them and perhaps they have changed his routine. My son LOVES school but sometimes cries and says he doesn't want to go. I think it's natural for them to sometimes feel some anxiety over being separated from you. Once my son gets to school he is fine and has a great time.

Amy - posted on 11/29/2009

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Quoting Dyanne:

Have you asked the teachers if something has changed? When was the last time you spent some extended time there to observe? When was the last time you did a unannounced drop-in to see what's happening and how your child is doing? I was an infant/toddler preschool teacher and provider for many years and parents were always welcomed at any time and that is how it should be!!!



There are a couple of new teachers and when I get there in the afternoon his regular teacher is usually gone for the day. I ask them every day for a detailed breakdown of his day. I never show up at the same time so everyday is unexpected when I show up(crazy work schedule). Maybe there is a new child that is disruptive? I need to talk to his teacher. Is it possible to request a one-on-one visit?

Dyanne - posted on 11/29/2009

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Have you asked the teachers if something has changed? When was the last time you spent some extended time there to observe? When was the last time you did a unannounced drop-in to see what's happening and how your child is doing? I was an infant/toddler preschool teacher and provider for many years and parents were always welcomed at any time and that is how it should be!!!

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