Please give me advice

Alicia - posted on 04/04/2010 ( 9 moms have responded )

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My 2 year old is having severe temper tantrums that seem to be getting worse as time goes on. I've tried everything, from time out, to yelling, to talking calmly to him to see what the problem is. Nothing helps these terrible tantrums. He screams on the top of his lungs, bangs his head on anything hard, gets violent towards anyone who is near him. He is miserable 95% of the day..EVERYDAY! Please give me some advice as to what I can do. I'm willing to try almost anything.

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Jennifer - posted on 04/07/2010

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When my daughter is in tantrum mode, it's usually because she needs a small snack. It works most of the time. She's growing so much now, so she needs more fuel. Sometimes she just needs to let some steam off, too. Then the only thing you can do is wait it out. Don't try to reason with him when he's ranting, wait until he's done. I've noticed that the more I try to talk to my daughter while she's in tantrum, the more fuel I add to the fire. Good luck!

Melanie - posted on 04/06/2010

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terrible twos we all got though it.With both of mine i ignored it and then was over the top with interaction with good behavior.My daughter was worse(wud head bang) so i made a cushioned area and place her there and ignore her till she stopped.if she moved i put her back.i now have a time out spot which she sits for 4 mins(her age) when she misbehaves. Its normally worse for us has parents,stop it now b4 he gets older.

Libby - posted on 04/06/2010

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wow, I really feel for you. Have you talked to any doctors. Don't give up on him hopefully it's nothing and it will pass. 95% seem very high to me to be unhappy, I would consult a dr. Good Luck..

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My daughter is almost 3 and she's get those tantrums sometimes. When talking doesn't help, or distraction doesn't do any good, you may just need to let him go to a quite place, like his room or a bathroom stall if you are in public, and scream it out. I always have to ignore her when she's yelling because most of the time she was trying to get attention or mad because she didn't get her way. There have been a few times where she would get really bad and hit, I'm not sure what is best there. Popping my daughter's hand always made it worse. Maybe try telling him how you are feeling when he gets that way and see if we will do the same. Sometimes that works for us. You just have to TRY to understand what is setting him off and have a whole arsenal of tricks.

Jen - posted on 04/05/2010

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if he does sumthing wrong pretend to throw his fav toy away say are u going to be a good boy if he says yes then give it him back n explain to him not to do wht his doing

Louise - posted on 04/05/2010

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Tough love is required here. When tantrums strike just pick him up put him somewhere safe and ignore him until he has calmed down. Children hate being ignored and he will soon realise that a tantrum does not get him what he wants and that is attention from you. After a few enforced time outs like this he should start to tone down the tantrums to a managable state where you can try the warning and time out method but for full blown tantrums like he is having you have to control this first. Give it a go. No eye contact no verbal just place in a safe room and let him scream, when calmed down a little (and for the first time may take a good 10 minutes) go back in and then try and reason with him. Tell him you don't like being screamed at and you will put him back in this safe place again if he does not stop it. Children understand more than you think.

Claire - posted on 04/04/2010

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When our kids are at the peak of tantrums, we do the pack n play in the middle of the room, then leave the room. They can't climb out (yet) and they're safe from hurting themselves or others until they calm down. You, at that point, get to go to another room and clear your head, even if you have to run the shower to drown out his noise!

Bernie - posted on 04/04/2010

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my daughter is the same way now, shell be 2 in may.. everyday seems to be getting worse. its just there age i guess but when she gets really bad i just put her in her bed room and way away, it normaly works for a while after wards. good luck..

Melissa - posted on 04/04/2010

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Is there a pattern to them? Is he trying to tell you something he cant express? Or is it over just anything to get your attention? You might find your answer looking at the different situations and/or time of day. Close to sleeptime? Frustrated with other kids? Sorry, I know its not much help....

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