temper tamptrums

April - posted on 12/13/2010 ( 2 moms have responded )

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my 3 year old throws horrible fits ive tried everything and just want some new ideas to help her control her anger..

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Louise - posted on 12/14/2010

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The way to handle tantrums is to stop them from starting in the early stages. You can probably tell when she is about to through a fit so try diversion tactics. If she does not respond to that then if she is at home and in safe place just completely ignore her. My two year old did brew for a tantrum from time to time so I would just say "Stop that silly noise" and then ignore her she soon learnt that screaming did not get her what she wants. Now the only tantrums we get are from pure frustration when she can't make her body do what she wants to do. That is something she will grow out of and really is not bothersome at all. Try the ignoring first as this is very affective.

Tessa - posted on 12/13/2010

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With my daughter we have a step by step telling off process and Im proud to say it never involves hitting her! (unless were batting her hand away from scizzors or a hot stove or something obviously)

When we see her doing something wrong we tell her in a firm voice not to do what shes doing and a reason why ie. "Lily, stop that tantrum, there is nothing wrong and no reason to get so upset."

If she doesnt stop I say "Lily, if you havent stoped by the time I count to three then you are going to bed" Then I count to three slowly, warning her between each time. If she still hasnt stopped I sit her down on her bed. then I leave the room for a couple of minutes.

If she keeps going then I come back in and tell her "Lily if you are still having this tantrum by the time I count to three, your going to loose IgglePiggle (her favorite toy) for the rest of the day" Then I count to three again, if she hasnt stopped, i put igglepiggle in the top of her wardrobe and leave the room for a few minutes.

I repeat the thing with the toy for up to four toys. If she is still going then I come in sit on the bed, look her in the eye and say VERY seriously "Lily, if you do not stop the tantrum then you are going to have to go to bed. You are going to make yourself sick crying like that and there is no reason for it. Would you like to go to bed, or would you like to play?" If she keeps crying I close her curtains, turn on her night light, tuck her into bed give her a kiss and say good night and leave the room.

I havent had to put a toy away in months with that method.

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