Toddler Talking Back

[deleted account] ( 4 moms have responded )

My daughter is about to be 3. She has started this terrible attitude where it doesn't matter what we say she has something rude to say or tells us to stop talking. She's never been this rude and it's really starting to wear on mommy and daddy. Any suggestions?

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Amy - posted on 04/06/2010

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I've been sending my daughter to her room or sticking her nose in the wall. She has a bad habit of trying to talk over us. When mom and dad are talking, she should not. She's also started sassing. We skipped terrible twos, but she's making up for it. Just keep on her. Take away toys, movies, books, whatever will get her goat. We made our daughter stand to eat her supper because she was bobbing all around and on her knees, on her butt, twisting around at the dinner table. Told her if she can't sit properly in the chair, she'll have to stand for supper. She did and the next night she held still. Be consistent in that there will be a punishment if she acts out, but change up what the punishment is. People think I'm nuts, but my daughter might think it's worth it to sass if she only has to have her nose in the corner. Today she yelled at me because she wanted candy, so I said, no, you don't yell at me. It's rude. Now you don't get candy. And promptly put the candy in the garbage. She had a little meltdown but I'll bet if she wants candy she won't yell at me ever again for it.

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Janice - posted on 04/06/2010

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i hear you and my 2 1/2 does te same thing but i tell her that i won't listen until you can talk to me nicely and sometimes it work but i let her that you don't talk to poeple that way, and the chair in the corner works

Michelle - posted on 04/06/2010

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go down to eyhe level and say that is not good behaviour mommy and daddy do not like that if she does it again pick her up and put her in the corner for awhile say 3 to 4 mins even if she gets back up put her there again keep doing this til she stays there for 3-4mins then go down to eye level and say you were in the conrer because you didnt listen to mommy and daddy and were rude say sorry once she does give her a cuddle and move on it mite take awhile but its working wonders for my son

Meryl - posted on 04/06/2010

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It's so difficult isn't it because you want to tell her off firmly and can so easily end up speaking in the same manner!! I'm sure she's not hearing this way of speaking in her environment but if so, little ones so often reflect adult language and attitudes. Mine has taught me many a lesson in this way!

How about calmly putting one of her favourite toys away in the cupboard for a couple of days when she is rude, telling her why, and getting it out again when she can talk nicely. A friend of mine actually sent one of her sons trains to the charity shop! Just the threat of it after that had an amazing effect! (I did think that was harsh mind you).

Perhaps completely ignore her until she speaks properly and then give lots of attention and praise. Or, say.. 'can you think of another way to say that?' and model an alternative if necessary. and 'oh yes, that's lovely, well done'. It will probably take a long time to change this pattern so patience will be required! Good luck!

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