Will my 14mo grow out of being cuddled to sleep?

Janine - posted on 07/02/2012 ( 2 moms have responded )




My DS has always had difficulty switching off from the world to go to sleep and I have resorted to either breastfeeding and when that stopped working, cuddling him to sleep. I should probably define "asleep" here: it's when he's just lightly asleep, eyes shut just around the twitching stage.

Mostly this takes about 30 mins of nursing / cuddling, but sometimes can be an hour or more (which I find too long).

What I am worried about it that he won't grow out of the need to be cuddled to sleep. Does anyone have any similar experiences?

Although he can go to sleep by himself it takes a long time (an hour), which then really messes up his whole schedule as he either doesn't sleep long enough at night or it pushes back subsequent sleep times. Initially he cries when I leave him and can be quite distressed, which I find really difficult. Then he'll play / chat for the remainder of the time.

My temptation is to carry on cuddling him to sleep as this seems to be the kindest and quickest way to naps or sleep.... but what happens as he gets older?

Thanks for any thoughts.


Charlene - posted on 07/03/2012




Hi janine,

my son is 22mnths old and im havin a little trouble myself gettin my son to sleep at bedtime now.

ive always held him in my arms bouncin him on my lap, tapping his bum till he fell asleep, it used to take me no longer then 10mins, but still even though i new he would be asleep soon, i still used to say in my head how much longer am i gonna do this, when wil he learn to put himself to sleep.

so now as he has got holder he doesnt want me to hold him anymore he wants to lay in his own bed with his blanky with me next to him, but that doesnt work he just ends up looking aroung and after a little while he gets board and wants to get out of bed start playin with toys so i have to keep puttin him to bed in my arms, but i dont bounce or tap i just gentaly sway my lags side to side and that now works, because i was gettin leg cramps and pains in my wrist, he is able to put him self to sleep on his own now, but my problems is he doesnt want to go to bed, i have a job gettin him to close his eyes, he has always had a routain its dinner at 5:30 bath at 6:30 then i start bed time at 7/7:30 and as soon as he see's he's blanky thats it he's not happy but i have to be strong and not give in, this started 2 weeks ago and most night it can take me hours, one night he didnt fall sleep till 11:20pm oh my god i was tired. but my point is your baby will grow out of it.

other mums say to me just put him to bed and let him cry n that till he learns mummy cant always put me to bed with cuddles n stuff, but im a flat and my neighbours ant very nice so i my care for my sons learning gets effected because of where i live, but you have to do what you think is right and what works for you.

also every child is diffrent what works for others may not for some, i only know from being a mum to my son, and that i have to stop holdin him eventualy, but another problem i got is that my son still isnt talkin so i knt say to him ok its bedtime lets have one story and tell him this is your bed u sleep in here, so if i say that to him now he will just say goo goo gar gar lol so i wil continue to hold my son in my lap till he starts talkin then he can start going to bed probley, but at the end of the day there not are babys for long and they will go threw many stages some take time some dont but eventualy they do learn , it hard work but we do it. what i might of said may not of helped but at least you know your not on your own hun, keep cuddling if you want he will show you changes as he gets older.

one more thing when i put my son down for he's nap it take seconds lol but bed time is diffrent its stranged, xx


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September - posted on 07/03/2012




Our son is 3.5 and we still lay with him at night until he falls asleep. I like the cuddle time with him so it's what we do. I would just keep doing what you're doing. He will grow out of it at some point.

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