How do you keep from going insane?

Krystal - posted on 12/07/2009 ( 8 moms have responded )

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I have 4 yr old twin boys and a 3 yr old son. I am attending Univeristy of Phoenix online and I am a stay at home mom. The boys keep me very busy during the day. My husband works during the day as a flooring installer and at night at his own tattoo shop. We just moved to ND where is is freezing all the time so the boys and myself dont leave the house very much. I have no friends or family up here. I am wondering what to do to keep from loosing my mind. I love my boys but sometimes I feel like I lost me. Any suggestions would be great!!!

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Jenny - posted on 02/06/2010

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At one point my twin boys were 4 and our daughter was 3.Now they are 6 and she will be 5 March 1st! Time really flies! What has really helped for us is parent strategies! We read and attended Love and Logic seminars. This has equipped us to really understand their behaviors, replace emotion with empathy and allow natural consequences for their choices (as long as they aren't in danger of serious injury) I also made sure there were things for them to do (rotate toys). Puzzles, duplo legos, wooden blocks and playdough provide hours of fun! Include them in chores (i know, takes longer, but you are teaching them good life skills!) And...lower your expectations. I find that when I don't have my agenda of my to do's, I am less frustrated at my day. We also have a 'jewels' reward jar. Each child has a glass and when we catch them doing something good( alot of character building), we praise their efforts with adding jewels and when they make a bad choice they have to remove a jewel. When they fill it to the top, they get a special date w/both or one of us to either a movie w/popcorn, bowling and frozen yogurt, fishing etc... They love it and we love it too! With 3 so close in age, its hard for us to do one on ones, and this builds it in and it's something they really look forward to and are motivated by! Good Luck!!! Oh, and the best advice given to me, don't sweat the small stuff, choose your battles wisely, and praise, praise, praise! You are helping to shape this little person's identity!!!

Rachel - posted on 02/04/2010

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I think it helps to have some type of schedule planned out! It helps the time go by faster! Breakfast, then tv, then color,then snack.....IDK, just suggestions! ANd if they don't take a nap, maybe have rest time after lunch? Schedules help keep my sanity! Good luck, it will get better!

Aurora - posted on 01/30/2010

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I have triplets(B,G,G). When it is rainy day out here for us in CA. We take the kids to IKEA and let them run around and we have lunch there too. I don't know if you have an IKEA where you live. At home w/my supervision I let the kids jump off the storage cabinet (its no to high) onto big bean bags on the floor. That tires them out. We listen to a lot of kids music and dance. Watch movies. Everyday at some point we dump all their books on floor and sit and read or look at pictures. Thank God a I have family to help, but I still go crzy too. I will pray for you to make a great reliable friend (maybe college girl) to help you out in your outings or at home. Take care.

Mary - posted on 01/29/2010

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From a mom of 4 year old twins and a 3 year old as well, I find preschool half days(4 @3-4 hours a session) a real break for me. They attend church sponsored programs which do not cost a lot and really give them a chance to learn and explore.

User - posted on 01/25/2010

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I had three children all under the age of one and they were not triplets but a set of twins. It is not easy but it can be structured. This has to be done at the very outset to set early discipline and routine. Try to sit down and work out a plan for the day, such as how early you will get up and do what type of chores before the children awake. Day care, mother and baby sessions can be helpful at least once a week. Make and freeze dinners. Have a weekly menu for the family and keep a visible list of things to do today and list priority. This may not be suitable to you but try some of them. Get your rest it is important to function in every situation. Play the game of who can tidy up the fastest and the winner gets a small treat. Try to get the children to make some of their toys using things from around the house, or even make salt dough and paint the objects. If the children appear to be very active, dress them appropriately and take them outdoors for a long walk or energetic fun.

Krystal - posted on 12/10/2009

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Thank you for the replies! I think it so hard now because we just move to ND where it is freezing and we cant go outside and still have no cable!!! But it will get easier and I want to enjoy the time before the boys go to school.

Carolyn - posted on 12/10/2009

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i used the local library alot at this age..........even that one hour they are in story time was a huge break..........actually look around at books on my own ! i also was a member at the ymca and the girls loved the swim/gymnastics clasees.....again, small break for me ! and once a week we went to BK playground.......the kids never liked the food so we would get ice cream after lunch and play there...........nice to cuz other moms to chat with usually..........adult conversations can be a nice way to stay sane also. good luck and remember in no time the bus will be coming for school !!

Melissa - posted on 12/09/2009

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Hey - I am sorry you are feeling this way. I think this is a common feeling with twins/triplets. I have family and what few friends that have stuck around for the last few years and I still feel like I am loosing my mind. I also feel like I lost me. I told my DH that Melissa was no more. Now I am mommy, not Melissa.

Some of the things that we do when we can't go out side are the mall. They do things for kids several times a month around here. I just keep a check on their web site and we go when they are having something. Also the indoor play grounds. Like McDonalds, Burgerking and such. I am not really fond of these places. Kind of germy but I carry hand sanitizer and wipes. Anytime they come over to me I am wiping them off. Also go during the week on a Tues, Wed or Thurs and there are not that many people there.

I know what you mean about them keeping you busy at home, but take one day a week and go do something! It helps! I would be crazy if we didn't do something atleast one day out of the week! Tomorrow we are going to see Santa at the mall. They get to see Santa and the decorations and I get to talk to other adults. I won't know any of them but they will talk about more than batman or my little pony. I am looking forward to it!

If you need to vent I am here and I know how you feel!

Good Luck!

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