how will i handle my twin babies crying at the same time?

Missxin - posted on 05/02/2010 ( 20 moms have responded )

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Most of the time , when the girl cries , the boy does too .. they do almost the same thing ...
how will i do this??

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Justine - posted on 05/04/2010

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As everyone else says, you just will - you'll find a way that works for you. Most importantly, know that it WILL get easier as they get older. And don't beat yourself up over it - it's fine for babies to cry a little bit, it's just fine, don't stress too much over it - the most important thing when the babies are crying is for YOU to stay as calm as possible. Good luck xxx

Shannon - posted on 05/07/2010

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Remeber to breathe! Don't let them being upset, upset you because that makes it all worse. You will automatically do what needs to be done and it is okay to let them cry sometimes. My twins are 4 now and I also have two older girls. There were times that I just started crying with them and after a good cry we were all still okay! We survived it all and are still standing and even now I remind myself to...breathe!

Venus - posted on 05/06/2010

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keep reminding urself that ur only one person.. hand them one at a time if u can handle the crying..if not try getting more helpers

Emily - posted on 05/03/2010

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It's so hard, I know! When mine seemed to be crying for a reason I couldn't figure out, I sung (okay, I still sing!) to them constantly (not well, can't carry a tune to save my life, but they don't know the difference!). I found that if I sang to them when they were happy, they also found it soothing when they were really fussy. Especially when I would snuggle both of them and sing. Take them for a walk, a distraction for both you and them, fresh air is always good and they may fall asleep. Also, as a previous poster mentioned, try not to stress about it. The calmer you are (of course easier said than done!!!) the calmer your babies will be....if they sense you are stressed or upset, they will be more edgy. I also had a swing and eventually purchased a second one to help out, but even if one calms in a swing or a bouncy chair, it lets you focus on the other one. Not sure how old your twins are, but I did find that as they got older, it got better. Maybe not because they were less fussy, but perhaps because they were better communicators and I was better at reading them? Good luck, it can be so hard, I had a numer of meltdowns when my hubby came home to find me singing (when it didn't work....) while also crying to two screaming infants, while holding a number of things to distract them (which they were too young to look at, but I was clueless and desperate!!!). However, you do get used to the crying, it's never nice to hear your children upset, but you do get used to it, and learn that you just do what you can. Also, if you can....there are wraps/carriers that let you carry two at once...I never managed to find one that worked until they were a bit older, but I'm also not very co-ordinated. I have a friend with twins that it worked wonders for, if it's something you wanted to try.

20 Comments

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Ashley - posted on 05/07/2010

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My twins are 4 years now so I don't remember what I did when they were both crying. I think I'd probably rock or hold the one that was more upset, or gave them their comfot things (Allie liked a binky, Kylee liked silky things). The girls still will sometimes cry if the other is upset or hurt, I think its part of them being twins, lol

Christine - posted on 05/06/2010

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When mine were infants and I was nursing them, I found that they offset each other. When my Daughter would start crying, my son would startle and look around quietly. He learned patience, and was very easy going when I would have to tend his sister....who was more.. uhm...urgent. lol

Naomi - posted on 05/06/2010

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Hi,
I have found a really good strategy for both my 20 week old twin boys crying at the same time. I have got the technique from "the happiest baby on the block" - check it out on the net, you can watch clips to get the basic idea and you don't need to buy the dvd to get the idea. For bubs less than 4 months old it really works - employ the 5 S's; side/stomach, swaddling, shhing, swaying and sucking. Dr Karp does this with one baby, but I put both my bubs on their side in their cot next to each other, using one hand I hold their dummies in both of their mouths and the other hand is on their legs jiggling them. They calm down in no time at all. The worst part is the cresendo of screaming just before I swaddle them, but I am doing this calm now.Once they fall aspleep then I turn them onto their backs - but now they are starting to prefer settling on their stomach.

Initially we had been cuddling both of them while rocking them on our rocking chair, but that soon lost its calming factor for them

Emma - posted on 05/06/2010

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You just will hun - you'll find your own way of coping. I just tend to deal with one at a time and if the other has to wait, they have to wait - simple as that. It is hard at first but it does get easier xx

Joyce - posted on 05/06/2010

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Try distraction first. If that doesn't work, pick one. In order to make myself more able to relax and focus on calming the one I chose, I sometimes used to stick the other one in a bouncy in the kitchen and turn the stove fan on for white noise, then go soothe the other. Baby would usually have calmed himself to some degree when I returned and sometimes even fell asleep on his own.

Augusta - posted on 05/04/2010

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At first when one cries the other one will... but just remember you are only one mom.. just take turns feeding one first and then the other or changing one first then the other... you can do it! I am a mom of twins that are 11 months old and a toddler. I found my own way of doing stuff... Eventually it does get easier and they don't wake each other up at night or during nap time... and they get use to the noise while sleeping. As my twins got older they really calmed down. Hope this helps good luck xx~

Ciera - posted on 05/03/2010

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Just focus on the one who will calm down the easiest and then to the one who takes a bit more attention. Whatever reason they are crying just figure that out...dirty diaper? hungry? gassy? etc. Don't stress out over it though. Think of their crying as their "talking" to you. It's not hurting them to cry so don't be so stressed and frantic about calming them down, just handle it the way you would if they were just simply using words. You wouldn't get stressed about that. Learn to hear their crying, not through agitated ears, but through kind of a softened filter. It helps to stay calm when you realize that they are okay, just simply trying to communicate with you and it doesn't hurt them to cry, it actually can be good for their vocals and their stomachs to get stronger. No reason to just let them cry it all out all the time though, but definitely no reason to stress about it.

CHERYL - posted on 05/03/2010

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its hard isnt it distractions is a gud way but when they were younger i used to bounce them in their chairs as mine only cry when they are tired or hungry as they got older i got 1 baby walker and 1 door bouncer which they liked.they are now 10 ms and ive got used to them crying now i dont panic as much.

Leslie - posted on 05/02/2010

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Typically one is really crying and the other is just a copy cat. You can always tell the real cryer! I'll pick up that one and the other stops and goes on with their business. Otherwise if they are actually both upset, I'm on the floor with then both giving hugs.

Stephanie - posted on 05/02/2010

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yeah, it depended on why they were crying. :)
if I knew, then I dealt with it..... quickly.
if not, you start going through the list of possibilities. diaper? food? sleep? burp?...
if I got through the list and still was going deaf, :) I'd usually pick them both up for snuggle or a walk around the room. :) hehehe...
at that point, I'd put them down and hand them over to hubby. Your turn! I'm stuck.

Flick - posted on 05/02/2010

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if both of mine are crying I try to pick neither up and just try and distract them!! if that doesn't work it's usually double cuddles, which nearly always works :-)

Nicole - posted on 05/02/2010

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{ick up the one that is really crying and try and distract the lesser crying one with a toy or funny face

Kristy - posted on 05/02/2010

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You just do it. Do what you can to stop one twin crying, and hope the other one stops as well. You'll figure out what works for you soon enough. My twins both had reflux and there was a lot of crying at the same time - I bought a baby swing and figured out my boy loved to be in it, this calmed him and let me calm my girl down. That swing got used A LOT. My girl didn't really like the swing... that's what worked for us. It's really hard to have two babies screaming and only one set of arms, but in the end crying isn't going to kill them, just make you feel awful! Just do what you can.

Shei - posted on 05/02/2010

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it is helpful to know what causes the crying... identify it cause usually when one cries the other does too..

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