18 year old feeling all Grown Up

Adrie - posted on 03/03/2013 ( 7 moms have responded )




Need advise on how to best handle my son that thinks he is a grown up and can do what he pleases. He started to hang out with friends at a Hookah lounge and he thinks is safe. Has anyone experience this situation? I need advise on how to address this with him without making feel bad.


Dove - posted on 03/03/2013




He is a grown up..... If you have a problem with his decisions coming out of concern for his health and well being.... sit down with him and explain what it is you don't like and why you feel it is not a good idea... not just for him, but for anyone. Even though you are his parent... try coming at it as you would if you were talking to a friend that you were concerned about. He might just listen (might not, but you never know if you don't try).

Kristi - posted on 03/05/2013





It is great that he is being open with you! That, at least, gives you an opportunity to express your opinion and still try to guide him in ways you think are best. He won't always listen but since you're not being judgemental and you are giving him a chance to make his own choices, he'll feel safe coming to you if he does find himself in trouble or if he realizes he made a poor decision, he is more likely to say, Mom, you were right...then he might give your advice a little more consideration next time. I remember about age 20 the light came on and out of no where it hit me that everything my parents ever told me was true! I wish your family the best!

Michelle - posted on 03/03/2013




Like the other ladies have said, he's 18 and considered an adult. You need to let him make his own decisions unless he has a mental disability and is unable to, then you need to get some help. Otherwise you need to trust that you brought him up well enough for him to make the right decisions for himself.

Liz - posted on 03/03/2013




At 18 he is grown up.

If you have strong opinions concerning what you do or don't want him to do, all you can really do is talk to him and advise him.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 03/03/2013




Well, technically he is all grown up. He is an adult and can make adult decisions.


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Adrie - posted on 03/04/2013




Thank you all for your feel backs. He is still living at home and I would hate to see him leave because of a disagreement. He is not a dependent person that I could just let loose. It is tough right now because although we as parents understand that this is new for him (since he just turned 18) and feels that he can do what he wants, we are still responsible for him.

My goals was to hear stories from other and see if anyone has experience a similar situation with their kids. I grew up with much more respect, but I still did what I wanted without letting my parents know. At least, my son is being honest and open with us.

Again, I really appreciate your responses, encouragement and words. Thanks a lot.

Kristi - posted on 03/04/2013




I agree with the other moms but if he still lives under your roof, you can set house rules that he has to follow in order to stay there. Even with those rules, I don't know if you'd be able to dictate where he goes. That's such a hard situation. Good luck!

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