20 months and still sleeping with mom. OK? Or not OK?

Holly - posted on 06/06/2011 ( 7 moms have responded )




People keep telling me it will lead to issues into his youth and cause him to be clingy. I don't mind that he sleeps with me... I like it. What should I do? When is the appropriate time to tell him he has to sleep on his own?


[deleted account]

Depends. Is it ok with you? That is all that really matters.

My 3 year old slept in our bed just until a few months ago, and at least every other day comes back in around 4am. She is a well adjusted, & highly social child. My 2nd child who is 1 year cares nothing for co-sleeping in the least, my 7 month old son can take it or leave it depending on how he is feeling.

I did what was right for my daughter, she was not ready to sleep on her own, and nightly I have to read or stay with her until she dozes off.

I think people are giving you a hard time because he is a boy. My daughter who slept with me daily for years has no issues, and when she needs to or is scared she is more than welcome to be my bed bug. I tired to get her in her own room earlier and it was horrible for her.

Lots of parents have lots of opinions, but they aren't being really honest about what goes on behind closed doors sometimes because they are worried about what other people will think of them.

If you are ok with it, then it is ok. I do not think it will make him clingy. Ever child is different.


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[deleted account]

My oldest sons are 12 and 10 they co slept with me until they were around 4 and neither of them are clingy, in fact they are extremely independant.

Kayla - posted on 06/07/2011




this all depend on you .... i have a child that is going to be four and i just got him into his own bed .... also i have a 22 month old that will play all night if i put her into bed with me .....things i dont think that there is a cut and dry answer .... it depend on a few different things .... the situation, child, and you.... can you handle a few nights of little to no sleep ... lots of crying ..... and of coarse a very cranky little one the next few days?

OhJessie - posted on 06/07/2011




People tell you what? LOL - most people don't understand co-sleeping, that's all. Don't even discuss it with them if they're ignorant. My son was probably at least 4, then we had bunkbeds in our room for them (not that he didn't still climb in sometimes, or sometimes they would just camp out next to the big bed) and uh, yeah, as an adult? He'd be like "sleep in your bed, are you crazy? Get out, I'm going to sleep now". Clingy? LOL - I could almost wish they were, but yeah, no. Quite independent I assure you. A well-bonded, comforted baby (and 20 months is still very much a baby) is more secure and less afraid of the world, not more.

Lisa - posted on 06/07/2011




i read that actually especially if your a working mom its good bonding time my daughter sleeps with me every night and shes not clingly you no your child and whats right for them

Kate CP - posted on 06/07/2011




If you're happy and he's happy then who the hell cares? It won't scar him for life. Some kids co-sleep until they are 5 or 6. If you don't think it's a big deal then everyone else can bugger off.

Lissa - posted on 06/07/2011




Out of my three my youngest never slept well and was only completely comfortable when sleeping with me, he did go into his own bed but still crawled in beside in the early hours until he was five. He is in no way clingy, when you give a child the comfort he needs he will grow up to be confident. If you ignore your childs need to be comforted that is when they will grow up to be clingy. If you and your son are happy with the arrangement then ignore others, at some point when he feels ready he will sleep on his own.

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