4yr old hitting - just a phase?? tips to help

Sarah - posted on 08/17/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )




So my boy is 4 next month and has just started hitting and pushing over the boy that hes in care with, he only does it when i turn up to pick him up...any ideas how i can help him before it gets worse?????


Marcy - posted on 08/17/2011




Ahhh....the hitting/pushing phase. Such fun. First off if he is only doing it when you go to get him its probably a jealousy thing. He wants his mommy and he doesn't want anyone else around you. its never to early to let them know that hitting/pushing/etc is unacceptable behavior. My son started doing this about the same time and we have been dealing with it on and off for over a year. It usually comes out in full bloom when he is mad and not getting his way. of course he knows its wrong snd we tell him so everytime. We even have gone as far as taking away one toy each time he hits etc but now he just says 'I don't care." so we have moved on to him not being allowed to play outside with his friends. That seems to have hit home (no pun intended). This is a tough age and my only saving grace is that I remain calm throughout the whole thing....never raising my voice or letting him get the better of me. It will get better...


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Kim - posted on 08/24/2011




I used to work in a day care, but my son was not in my classroom. I found out that he was becoming a bully, only to find out that it was a defence mechanism. He had been being bullied, and decided at 4 yrs old that if you couldn't beat them, he should join them. Maybe your son is feeling empowered by your arrival, because he has been being bullied all day while you are not there. I would talk to the "babysitter", and get to the bottom of this. In the mean time, find a way to express that two wrongs don't make right.

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