5 year old manipulating me to sleep in our bed and uses all kinds of excuses.

Nadia - posted on 10/22/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )




I don't know what to do with my 5 year old son who just don't want to sleep in his own bed in his own room. We even put his bed in our room but still he does not want to sleep there. If me and my husband askes him whats the problem then he will say stuff like but their is enough space for him in our bed. Or if I maybe say listen tonight I will sleep in your room cause you don't want to then he will say its fine I can go he will lie by his father then. its causing problems between me and my husband. My son don't wanna go to bed if one of us don't lie by him even if we have people over he will lie on the couch and fall asleep their. He uses excuses and telling me and his father what to do.


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Jodi - posted on 10/22/2014




Oh boy, you are truly in for it if you can be dictated to by a 5 year old now. In 10 years, you'll be back here wondering why your 15 year old is telling you to 'f off" and just leaving at night to be with his friends even when you've told him no and coming home drunk or stoned (yes, I work with teens like that, and it isn't pretty).

You need to learn to say no, put your rules/boundaries in place, and you need to learn to issue consequences if he decides to be difficult about your rules. If he can't accept your rules and work within them, how is he ever going to learn to comply with the boundaries that society places upon us?

Spring - posted on 10/22/2014




Girl your son is manipulating you an your husband, you need to set boundaries an tell him that is a husband an wife bed is special and if he had a friend over he wouldn't yall sleeping w him. Start off one night at a time. Make him read you a book and give him a night and confirm that your close by and he will be safe. It will be hard at first but he'll start being proud of himself an make sure both you an your husband commend him for doing so well in his bed. This will work if you stick w it.

Sarah - posted on 10/22/2014




You are the parents. If you don't want him in your bed then don't allow it. You have to set the boundaries. Right now you have set the boundaries that he can come into your bed. You can't expect him to not fight it or not try to come into bed with you. That is where you have to be the parents and parent. If you don't want him in your bed then you need to not allow it....it is really that simple. He may try to come into your bed in the middle of the night, or right away when he goes to bed, or he may want you to lay with him in his bed but then come into yours.......that is him being a smart child and trying to figure out how to get what he wants. You then have to be the parent and set the boundary of not allowing it. He tells you what to do because you do it. You are allowing a 5 yr old to control the household. If you don't want him controlling the house then you have to set up and be parents.

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