6 Months Pregnant Boyfriend Just Went To Jail

Imani - posted on 10/18/2015 ( 3 moms have responded )




I am currently 6 months pregnant and have a 4 year old. My boyfriend was taken into custody late last week, he is already a 2x felon. I am trying to stay strong, but it is hard. My 4 year old son adores him, although, he is not his biological father, he is his father.

We recently found out (2 days before he was arrested) that there maybe something wrong with the baby. I have had 3 ultrasounds in the past 2 weeks, and still have to go back for another this week! I am a wreck. I got to see and speak to my bf for the first time since he was taken last night. It was sweetest day (I live in the midwest) yesterday, and tomorrow is our first anniversary.

I have known this man for years, and am totally in love with him. I was living in another state and decided to move back home to be with him. His family is wonderful, they feel like my own. I really have no connection with my real family here, my mother is back on the west coast, where i was living. I have no intention of breaking up with him, he is an amazing man that has made some stupid mistakes. It seems that the police have been watching him for sometime, I have no clue if he will be released at the end of the month or by the time this baby inside me is in 1st grade. I am left clueless until the end of the month..

I guess i got on here to get some advice and words of encouragement. I feel like I'm going to have a mental breakdown. I have no appetite, can't really sleep, and have not been back to work since this happened (about 3 days). I am so thankful that my boss is 100% understanding. I will go back tomorrow, but i need to find some peace of mind today, to keep me going.

I know nobody is in my same exact situation, but, maybe some positive words can uplift me. Or you can tell me what helped you through the hardest time of your life...

Thank you all...


♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 10/18/2015




Ok, well, I can't be positive about a relationship with someone who "may" have made ONE bad choice, but is continuing to MAKE those poor choices...thus he's already a 2 x felon! HE WOULD CHANGE IF HE WANTED TO, MY DEAR, AND HIS INDICATION IS THAT HE'D RATHER BE A CAREER CRIMINAL.

Your best choice at this point is to make sure that paternity is established, and that there are legal guidelines in place for not only HIM getting access to his currently unborn child, but also provisions for his family to see the child. And I'd stop there. I'd move on, learn to live and raise my kids on my own, without interference from a person who's historically proven they'd rather commit a felony than be a good citizen, partner, and parent.

YOU CAN do this on your own.

As far as baby is concerned. Don't put the cart before the horse. Wait until test results are in before you let yourself be stressed about things. Stress won't help the baby, or you. Get into a support group for women in a similar situation with the pregnancy. Ask your physician for recommendations. If his family is supportive, that's great, but ultimately, unless he can completely turn around, you don't need a repeat felon in and out of your kids lives.


View replies by

Raye - posted on 10/19/2015




Sorry, my first instinct is to tell you to dump this guy. Your oldest kid will be better off without that kind of role model in his life. And your child with this man should be able to know his father and father's family, but you can provide a more stable atmosphere in that child's life if you aren't in a relationship with the father. Sorry, it's not what you wanted to hear, but it might be the best thing. Shawnn's right, if your BF wanted to turn his life around he would have instead of ending up in jail AGAIN.

I agree that stressing about the tests won't help you or the baby. Focus on keeping yourself healthy and strong.

Dove - posted on 10/18/2015




Thank you for posting Shawnn. I had no idea how to put a kind and positive spin on what I wanted to say here.

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