8 month old with really bad separation anxiety HELP HELP HELP!!!!

Natasha - posted on 09/24/2009 ( 6 moms have responded )




i will start off with with the fact that i am still breastfeeding and also formula feeding. so she has no problem with taken a bottle of formula. we have been doing both since she was 4 months old with no problem. but when im not there she refuses to eat at all untill i get back.

it seems as soon as i leave she goes nuts!!! consistent crying no matter what you do with her. last nite i tried to get out to watch a movie with my dh and i got i call from my sister at the end and she said 5 mins after i left she started crying and didnt stop for 2 hours. she didnt want to call because she felt bad that i dont ever get out and wanted me to have a good time.

i find it very stressfull for both of us. it breaks my heart that she gets so upset without me there ,but on the other hand i need a break. its very rare i every get to do something.

i will be going back to work this january and my sister will be taken care of her and i dont know how im going to get her to stay with someone else.

i am a first time mom and have no experience with this and would really like some advice and tips on how to deal.

is it every going to end :(


View replies by

Angela - posted on 03/17/2014




Babies need their mums. If they disappear, they're upset. Isn't that how it's meant to be! Mums are the most important person in their lives! Be there for them, they'll learn to be able to independent as they grow older and can take risks. But while they need you, love it up! They grow up all too soon

Arminda - posted on 09/24/2009




it's normal reaction. relax... my son is like that. just like your baby, tha moment he noticed im no where in his sight, he'll burst into tears and cry. as if someone hurt him and he wouldn't stop. what i did is i try to invite people around the house every now and then, so that he'll get used to a lot of faces aside from mine. i will not leave him but introduce him to his visitors as if im introducing my boyfriend to my friends. lets them interract with him so that he'll get used to see other faces. this gesture at your baby's young age will help a lot.

it's also important to talk to her like you're talking to your grown up daughter.

also, at this point you should ask your sister to stay more often with her so that when you return to your job she'll be comfortable with her. she will come around, and yes, it will end sometime, my son is 1yr 7 months now and he no longer cries when i leave. sometimes i miss that, so enjoy every moment you have. ^_^

Ashley - posted on 09/24/2009




i JUST got done dealing with this myself. mine is 11 months now.. it started when he was 7 months and lasted for about 2 months or so. its just a phase.. it will end soon :)

Liz - posted on 09/24/2009




my boys did the same thing when i would take them to the sitter. we would leave when they werent looking. and it worked. then after awhile they would say bye and they were okay with us leaving them

Britney - posted on 09/24/2009




to tell you the truth it is just a phase it stops for a while once they get around 12mo then it starts back up around 18mo. The best thing to do (which worked sometimes and other times didnt) put her in a safe play area, put some music on, give her her favorite blanket and toy, and just take a deep breath pray and walk away get what you need done and then go back to her, she will learn that mommy is away just for now and she is coming back, this take tons of time and lots of tears (yours probably) because it is going to break your heart but it will get better. Good Luck :)

[deleted account]

Relax!! The more you seperate yourself from her the more she will get used to being away from mommy. My first born had the same issues. What you are doing is the right thing, don't go back as soon as you hear she is crying. It will take a few times but she will get the hang of it. Try taking breaks more often, about once a week to get her into the rutien of it, babies love rutien...(sorry, can't spell). Also try spending more time at your sisters with her, she will feel more comfortable there and after a while she won't notice you left.

I hope this helps!! Good luck!

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