9 Year old ADHD and ODD Daughter failing because of laziness

Cathy - posted on 08/14/2015 ( 1 mom has responded )




Hi there. I have a major problem on my hands. My very intelligent 9 Year old daughter who has ADHD and ODD is just not interested in school and i get letters from the teacher saying that she is playing yet has been given enough time to complete tasks etc but she doesnt. We just recently studied for her English, Afrikaans and Maths Assessment tests that count at the end of the term and she new 98% of her work perfectly. She then wrote the tests but brought back awful marks. When i looked through the tests, I could see that it was something that we studied and she just scribbled nonsense as answers. I am not sure what punishment to give her to teach her that if these things or tasks are not done correctly there will be consequences. Ive tried taking away almost everything that entertains her... from her tv time, to her handheld games to just sitting somewhere for awhile to think of what she did and be bored (Kind of like a timeout), Ive tried the yelling and threatening etc and im getting nowhere. Im honestly on the verge of running away. I'm permanently defending her in situations and being loving and understanding and it now feels like im being shown the middle finger for all my effort and love. I need some form of help as i cannot carry on this way. I even take calming meds so that things dont get out of hand. My husband is an ADHD adult but he has been put on mood stabilizers. He sometimes loses it too bad and that is why ive taken over with the punishing etc because the two of them clash both being ADHD and having short tempers. Please please can someone help with an effective punishment that will help now and in the future. Nothing ive tried helps, not even the rewards program ive been doing for like 2 years now. its a chart where she gets stars and stickers for everything she does well and helps out with and then when the chart is full, she has a huge surprise waiting for her. Its almost like she doesnt care anymore because she knows that in the end once all of it is over, she'll get her games, toys, tv time etc back, so she just goes with the flow. She is currently on 54mg of Concerta for concentration etc and ive added that Mentat that is being advertised for behavior and ADHD kids. Even on that nothing is working. Please help!!!

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