Adult children

Deb - posted on 09/02/2016 ( 5 moms have responded )




I have an adult child who dealt a bad hand in life. He doesnt have a father or anyone to teach him. He is losing his way and slowly going down the tubes. I was going to co-sign for an apartment. But, everytime he meets a girl. He gets so screwed up and has lost his credit. He has live at 4 different places and owes them all money. Thats why i wont sign. He told me to quit talking to him. Ive been there for him too much. We went to clean his apartment and one of the people he lived by said " Is your mommy going to clean for you ? Is she changing your diaper ? Good lord


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Michelle - posted on 09/03/2016




The other ladies are right, you can't blame the way he is on not having a Father around.
You need to stop enabling him and let him make his own choices and then live with the consequences. That is life and we all go through tough times.

Clair - posted on 09/03/2016




Mama bear, you have helped him alot.

He should be more appreciative of you. Just wish him well and hopefully in time he will come and see the light

Jodi - posted on 09/03/2016




You know, there are plenty of kids who are dealt a bad hand. But there comes a point at which they need to take responsibility for their choices, regardless of the hand they were dealt. Not having a father around does not mean he can't be a responsible adult. You were there for him, but unfortunately, you appear to be enabling him and making excuses for him rather than holding him accountable for his actions. And as long as you are enabling him and continue to bail him out of whatever consequences there are for the bad decisions he makes, then you are doing him no favours. Yes, you have been there for him too much. It is time for him to stand on his own two feet.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 09/03/2016




He had you to teach him! Don't blame his inability to grow up solely on having no father.

Why was his father not involved? ( If he passed away, my condolences )

You, being his parent had the responsibility to teach him. If that didn't happen, the fault lies there.


If you raised him as well as you could, and tried to give him the tools to be a productive adult, then the fault is in your son. If you taught responsibility, and he is tossing it out, the only thing you can do is step back and stop helping him.

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