am 13 (not a mom) and i really want a bf but not allowed


Raye - posted on 01/08/2015




At 13 years old, you probably feel like you're practically an adult, but you're not. Your parents are legally responsible for you until you're 18, and they are trying to make the best decisions for you. They've lived through their teens, and they really do have a good idea about things that are appropriate for your age. I know that's not what you wanted to hear, and I'm sorry.

I was interested in boys at 13 years old, and I wish I would have waited until I was older. 13 is still too young to have a real relationship with someone, and you'll probably end up getting your heart broken many times before you find the right person to spend your life with.

Do you have a particular boy in mind?
If so, you might try talking to your parents about the qualities you like in this boy and why he would be a good person for you to hang around with. See if they will let you invite him over for dinner or something, so they can get to know him. If they agree to that, then hopefully your guy will be polite and show your parents that he has manners and will treat you well.

What you should know before dating:
1) You are a person worth being treated well. Don't let friends/boys treat you badly.
2) Your body is yours. Don't let boys pressure you into doing things you might not be ready for, and don't let your friends pressure you, either. I can guarantee that most girls your age are not making out, etc. and you don't have to do anything you're uncomfortable with just to try to fit in. If your friends pressure you, get new friends.
3) Be yourself. Don't pretend to like things because your friends/boyfriends like those things. If people don't like you for you, then they're not worth your time. Don't hide being smart, or being good at sports, or anything else that makes you unique. If someone likes you because they think you're a different kind of person, then it will be hard to keep up that image over time. You won't be happy, and they'll find out and be mad and leave anyway. It's best to be yourself from the start. There will be boys/friends that like you for you.
4) Don't rush into anything. You have your whole life ahead of you, and there will be many experiences (good and bad) you will have along the way. Don't be afraid of new things, but don't feel you have to jump into the deep end before you learn to swim. Go slow. Make sure you know who you are and what you're comfortable with at each step along the way. Have respect for yourself and don't compromise your values.

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