As a SAHM, is it ok for my husband to justify overspending because he earns the money - help please

Katie - posted on 11/13/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I am a stay at home mom with 2 children and also handles the financials for our family and our company that my husband runs. We have had a previous agreement to discuss any purchases, over 50 or 100 which works for our budget. The other night he dropped 200 on a jacket/hat and instead of hearing my concern I feel he changed the rules by telling me he earned it, he can spend that or 1000 if he feels like. This got heated on both sides. My concern is less about the jacket and more about not being accountable to the boundaries we decided together, the feel of superiority and the general dismissal of my position. I want to be fair but this feels wrong to accept that treatment. Am I just in feeling hurt, should he be able to change his mind without us agreeing on new boundaries and am I unreasonable to expect that? Please help me think this through as we are at an impasse.


Holly - posted on 11/13/2012




it probably was wrong for him to change something that was previously agreed on, but right now you sound like a bitter ex talking about instead of spending his money on his kids that he spent it on his jacket... perhaps just let him know that you would appreciate him consulting you on larger purchases... arguing isn't going to fix it... but in all honesty he IS the one who works his ass off for the money... if you have a problem on how it is spent, perhaps you need to get a job.

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