As a SM can I call the SK's

Megan - posted on 05/22/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )




I am SM to 3 great kids! BM has them every other weekend. Can BM be in contempt of court if she doesnt allow JUST ME to talk to the kiddos? What do you all think? My dh was away on a business trip and usually he just doesnt interfere with the whole thing Im going to call the kids while they are at BM's house once a day like BM calls our house.

But if my dh is supposed to talk to the children once a day at least can I make the call?? Wasn't sure what you would do on this situation.


Cynthia - posted on 05/22/2011




as a sm you don't have any rights to the kids. as sad as it is the court order does not apply to you. i am a sm too and i think it is not fair but that is the way it is. at least here where i'm from.

[deleted account]

What does the court order say? If it doesn't specifically say that YOU can talk to the kids then no, she can't be in contempt of court. If she only has them every other weekend then I really think it sucks that she may not let you talk to them since it sounds like YOU are the one raising them. Legally there is nothing you can do w/out going back to court and getting it written up in the order though (I think).

I actually had to get it specifically written into our court order that I can talk to my kids every day they are w/ their father (they only see him a few times/year... at most) cuz my ex would shut his phone off and not let me call....

Good luck!!


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[deleted account]

Depending on the state you are in and what the orders say, you can call all you want, but the BM may or may not have to answer.

I have a friend going through this right now (she's a stepmom). Her husband is deployed (he's in the Army) and he still does his weekly phone call from Iraq, but his wife cannot do "his" phone call instead of him. So, what they do is they have conference calls so they can all talk at the same time.

On the other hand, I am a custodial stepmom and when our daughter is on visits with her bio mom I am usually the one that calls (hubby talks to our daughter too, but I usually initiate the call because he's busy). BUT, we also send our daughter with her own phone so the bio mom can't restrict access (long story).

In the end, check the court order. If the order says your DH is to have once a day phone calls, that usually means that HE has to be on the phone for at least part of the call. If you still have questions, go to the family court this week and ask the self-help center (if your courthouse has one - ours has a volunteer lawyer who sits around and answers wuestions like that for free all day long).

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