Jade - posted on 03/03/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )




hi I'm 13 years old & want to talk about boys. I'm 13 years old & recently started talking to this boy he's also 13 & we go to the same school. we have became really close recently & both found we had feelings for each other. we have decided if we were to date we would want to wait & make sure we got to know esxhother better first. I respect him & he respects me & we have already set boundaries on us dating. I have a lot of respect for my parents & would never do anything behind their back. I'm an A/B student & do sports I do not get in any sort of trouble. I just find it hard to talk to my parents about this stuff. I know I should just introduce him as a friend first but how do I do that? I would definently tell my mom first because it's easier to talk to her about this stuff but how do I ask to hangout with some guy they don't know? but having him over would be weird because my house is pretty hectic with little kids & my parents are kinda awkward.


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Ledia - posted on 03/03/2015




Where do you hang out with your girlfriends? How did you introduce your parents to them?

I'm a mom heading into you're territory. My son is 10, so I know that boyfriends and girlfriends and social interactions that I may not know anything about are right around the corner. That scares the crap out of me, not because I don't trust him, but because I love him SO MUCH--a love that you will not understand until you are a parent--and I have doubts about how well I have prepared him for those situations. Under the age of 10 or 11, most mistakes you can make have only minor consequences, but by age 13, you have the freedom and autonomy to make some life changing mistakes.

It sounds like you are a responsible girl who has her priorities in order. If I were your mom, and you portray yourself in real life the way you portray yourself here, I would have no problem with you hanging out with the boy, but I would want to know about it, and I would want you hanging out in public places or where you are supervised. Not because I wouldn't trust you, but because I know how easy it is to get caught up in an emotional moment--your hormones are RAGING right now, girl, whether you can feel it or not. The easiest way to avoid letting your hormones get the best of you is to make sure you put yourself in situations where you stay in control--the mall, not the movies. A walk downtown, not into the secluded areas of the park. The family room, DEFINITELY NOT the bedroom.

Introduce the boy the same way you introduced your girlfriends, but put your barriers up a little further out than you would for the girls.

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