Can someone offer me advice on two issues that could end my relationship?

Steph - posted on 09/11/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I have 2 relationship issues that are intense enough to possibly bring an end to our 8.5 year relationship. In no particular order;

My spouse is a "messy" person. He leaves a trail of mess everywhere he goes. We both are the type of people that get stressed out when things are messy and unorganized. Our house is constantly messy due to both of us and the kids and I find myself constantly dedicating valuable time to cleaning when I wish I could be more productive doing other things. Also, we both dislike cleaning, so I end up being the one to sacrifice and clean up most of the time. To boot, he honestly does not believe that he is part of the problem.

The other issue is that he was raised quite differently than I was. As such, he is often offended by minor things that I do, stating that I am disrespectful, out of line, etc. In example; We were at a party and myself and all the other ladies were drinking some and jokingly posing for pictures. I lifted my leg, so the picture would look like I was in the middle of a karate kick. He was mortified. He said that made me look trashy and was an open invite for all of the males at the party to come and get me. The big issue is that I would never have thought that one act would have caused a problem. It was totally my nature to joke around like that and I didn't even think twice about doing it. I never thought that it would be an issue.

I have tried everything. I don't know how to get past these things and they are constantly causing us to argue. Anyone have any advice?


Ella - posted on 09/14/2012




The first one is us thing that could be worked on,meby u could draw up a rota so that he sees how much u do and then tell him u want him to put his name under 2or 3 jobs a nite or day to help u out and take sum responsibility for the house himself....the second one I'm not sure about it is strange that he as acted like this thoe u need t talk to him

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