Can you choose the sex?

Rachel - posted on 02/20/2010 ( 14 moms have responded )




My husband really wants a girl and i only want to have one more child is there anyways we can choose the sex? even if its expensive?


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Charlene - posted on 02/22/2010




Thanks everyone for their tips and info, I too also really want a girl so bad, I have 2 boys and really only wanted 2 kids, still not sure if I want to try it again and have a 3rd c-section and have 3 kids, as it will be alot of work, still confused as what to do, but I really want a girl and don't know how I would react if I got a 3rd boy.

Sharon - posted on 02/22/2010




Yes & yes.

The most accurate way is to have his sperm sorted. Getting a girl out of this method is more likely than getting a boy.

That means if you are trying for a girl, this process has a higher average of getting a girl than those using it to get a boy but the stats are impressive for either gender.

Alma - posted on 02/22/2010




well the next best thing is prayer and being happy with whatever u r blessed with. when u do conceive please dont stress ok.... be blessed and i wish u well....

Rachel - posted on 02/21/2010




Id love to adopt but over here it takes a minimum of 7 years and im not old enough im only 20 =(

[deleted account]

Also know that all of the tips mentioned above are not 100% proven accuracy 100% of the time. Just be happy and grateful for a healthy baby. I've heard of so many sad stories of women being so disappointed by the wrong gender, that they fail to acknowledge the baby. HEALTHY first, gender second. Best of luck to you!

Lindsay - posted on 02/20/2010




google what to do to have a girl and all kinds of things will come up.Thats what my cousin did to have her baby girl

Lindsay - posted on 02/20/2010




Trying to choose the sex of your baby, girl or boy, is a very old practice. Old customs were centered around the woman, because it was not understood that the determination of the sex of a baby really lay with the man. Though as wisdom grew, the practices changed to include men in the process of deciding, but the methods were still really out there, like tying up one testicles, believing that boys had one side, girls the other; sleeping with certain objects under the bed to influence the sex of the baby; or even medicines and poultices of odd combination including animal feces. The desire to choose the sex was that strong.

Today's desire is just as strong. In fact some places report that up to 90% of people would choose the sex of their baby if it were easier. The biggest change in the minds of sex selection is that girls are a high priority in some locations now.

How Sex Selection Works

Each parent contributes half of a baby's genetic make up. The female or mother is genetically an XX, so she is only able to contribute an X to the future baby. The father of the baby is XY and can contribute either an X or a Y. This means that sperm is the deciding factor in how your baby's sex is determined.

Over 200 million sperm are ejaculated into the vagina during intercourse, a mixture of X and Y. Most likely only one will be the one to penetrate the ovum.

Shettles Method

Dr. Landrum Shettles is known for his popular book on how to use low tech ways to conceive a baby of a particular sex, but particularly baby girls. This was true for girl or boy. The theory behind this girl getting Shettles method is that Y bearing sperm are faster but die more quickly. Therefore the goal is to stack the deck and have more X bearing sperm near the ovum at the time of conception. Following the "rules" of Shettles would mean that by the time the egg is released you have mostly the X bearing sperm left to impregnate the ovum. The basics are as follows:

•First you must know your menstrual cycle and chart it using your basal body temperature (BBT) charts.

•Once you have done this for a few months you can more accurately pinpoint ovulation.

•You will begin to have unprotected intercourse after your period ends.

•You should have sex once a day.

•Stop having marital relations about three days before you expect ovulation.

•For added optimism for a girl, you will want to choose sexual positions that place the sperm close to the entrance to the vagina, making the sperm have to swim further. An example would be the missionary position. (Note: If you're having trouble conceiving at all, this is not recommended.)

•Women should avoid orgasm during sex during conception attempts, this is to prevent the vaginal environment from being more alkaline, which supposedly is not favorable to baby girls.

Previously Shettles recommended certain douches to deal with the alkalinity issue, but has since backed off that because of the risk of infection.

The Girl Diet

There are some who say that what you eat will determine whether your baby is a girl or a boy. Here are some foods to stock in your pantry if you're trying to have a baby girl:


•Fresh vegetables


•Sweets, general

Other Helpful Girl Hints

•Have sex in the afternoon, rather than at night.

•Woman has an orgasm first.

•Only have marital relations on the even days of the month to have a baby girl.

•Woman initiates sexual relations.

•Woman on top or dominate positions. (Sitting or laying.)

•Have sex during the full moon.

•Use the Chinese Gender Chart to help you decide when to conceive.

Lindsay - posted on 02/20/2010




Tricks in Producing a Girl or a Boy

231 By now you may have heard about the new technology in which doctors can help you determine the sex of your next child. It involves invitro fertilization and it costs almost $19,000. Not everyone wants to go that route. Some people believe it is wrong morally. Some people just do not want to go through the process of invitro. Plus, most people do not have $19,000 lying around to spare.

The following is some ideas Dr. Landrum Shettles, MD wrote in his book called The Shettles Method. He supposedly has researched and come up with different positions and other aspects of the love making act couples can try that will possibly help in determining whether the sperm and egg will join together in making a boy baby or a girl baby.

Here are some examples of what the book recommends.

First to study his research you must know that Y equals the male sperm and X equals the female sperm.

1. If you want to have a girl, you should have intercourse 3 or more days before ovulation. Why? The Y sperms seem to be weaker at this time of the month.

2. Penetration into the vagina during intercourse is also important. Shallow penetration seems to favor girls and deeper penetration seems to favor boys? It has to do with the levels of acid PH. The entrance to the vagina has a higher level of acid.

3. Position during intercourse is important. If you want a girl, you should stick to the missionary position. If you want a boy, rear entry (doggy style) is the position you may wish to try.

4. Orgasms also play a role in determining the sex of a child. Actually, it is the female orgasm that plays the role. A woman's body releases a substance that rises alkaline levels when she orgasms. Boys are produced much quicker when there are higher levels of alkaline. For this reason, a woman should not try for an orgasm if she wishes for a girl.

5. If you love having sex, than you will love this idea for making a girl. You should make love every day after the first day of your period until 3 days before you start ovulation. Then you stop until the last day of your next period (unless you get lucky and you have no next period because you are pregnant)

6. Y sperm seems to like cooler temperatures. For this reason, if a man wants a boy child he should not wear tight underwear like briefs. He should wear boxers or underwear that will give him more breathing space. By the same token, you should not begin wearing tight briefs to conceive a girl. Wearing tight boxers just decreases the chances for a man to be fertile.

7. The X sperm likes warmer temperatures. Men wanting a baby girl should try taking a hot bath before intercourse.

8. Want a boy? Try having your man drink a cup of caffeinated coffee. Why does this helps? Dr. Shettles isn't sure. But it seems to do the trick sometimes and it will give the man more energy.

Don't think these ideas will do the trick? Maybe not. There may not be a sure way to determine what sex your baby is except for the technology way. But there is easy ways to determine if you are ovulating. The easiest way is to buy a kit. Charting isn't always, especially if your cycle isn't regular.

But it doesn't hurt trying some of Dr. Shettles suggestions. It might even be a little fun.

Just remember, the main thing is not the sex of the baby, but the health of the baby you have

Kath - posted on 02/20/2010




Hi, My husband had 4 daughters from a previous relationship and desperately wanted a son, I red the book "choosing the sex of your baby" , we ended up with a boy! Of course then i wanted a girl...... and we ended up with a girl.... I have also heard of something called sperm spinning, not sure what it is but it is done through the conception clinic to help with determining the sex of a baby...... maybe contact your local ivf clinic? good luck

Jocelyn - posted on 02/20/2010




Aww Cassandra beat me to it! lol
Just google spinning sperm :) for additional sites/information

Becky - posted on 02/20/2010




I'm not sure if there is a 100% foolproof way to choose the sex or not, other than adoption! The most extreme, and I would guess, most likely to be effective way, would be in-vitro fertilization, because I think (could be wrong) that they can determine the sex of the embryos and only implant you with the female ones. That would be really expensive though. There's also a method I've heard of called sperm-spinning. Not sure what it involves.

If you don't want to go for something as extreme, you can use the Shettles method. It involves charting your cycles, having sex at a certain point in your cycle, different positions, and eating different foods. Google it to find out exactly how it works.

We really want a girl next time around too - in our case, it's me who really wants the girl and my husband who only wants one more. We'll probably use some of the Shettles stuff, but mostly, we'll just leave it in God's hands. We're definitely not prepared to go to extremes.

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