Different parents, different rules= STRESS!!

User - posted on 01/22/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




My 14-year-old step daughter's mother allows the 16-year-old boyfriend to spend the night at their house every weekend. He doesn't live in the same town, so mother drives to the boyfriend's house and picks him up, so he can spend the WEEKEND with her daughter/my step daughter. My husband and I do not agree with this at all, and it is causing a lot of stress on what WAS a good father/daughter relationship..and in turn, it's causing stress on our family. The last two weekends, my step-daughter has asked my husband to go pick up her boyfriend and take them to her mom's house (Mom had to work). He offers to take them bowling or to the movies, but then boyfriend is getting dropped off back at home. So of course, she throws a fit, tells my husband he's weird, shuns him, and treats him horribly. My husband and his ex-wife do not speak which makes it even worse. Not sure what to do. Uggh!


Michelle - posted on 01/22/2012




Gosh that a tough one. Unfortuately, you husband and his ex wife really do need to speak to each other. It's far too difficult raising children in 2 households, with different rules, without discusing some basics.

I have done 50/50 shared care for over 7 years and my ex husband and I talk at least once a week, usually more.

Of course his daughter is ging to react that way when she's allowed to do what she wants at her Mum's house. Have you or your husband sat down with her calmly and discussed that she is underage and her borfriend could be charged? Try not to sound aggressive but explain to her that the law is there for a reason. That way you are taking your views out of it.

I don't know, I haven't arrived there with any of my kids and I'm dreading the teenage years. Good luck with it all though.

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