Do you think it is a bad thing to be over protective over your child regarding the crime in this world today?

Sophie - posted on 04/22/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )




The reason for this topic is because everyday I read about the rapes in this world and the idiots do such bad things to innocent souls, so everyday I seem to be more and more afraid for my little 4 year old so I read on the news, tabloids and on the televesion that the situation is getting worse day by day so I wonder in what world will our child escape to because some people are becoming perferts.


♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/23/2013




My short answer is YES it is a bad thing to be OVER protective.

Ditto the previous 3 ladies.

The better plan is to teach them to be aware, to protect themselves, and to know what to do in case of ________ (fill in the blank)

Perverts have always existed. Crime has always happened. Rapes have occurred. Child abuse runs rampant. Stupid people in the name of "religion" place bombs in public places.

Did these things just start happening? Nope, not by a long shot. Did you HEAR about them as much? Nope, you certainly didn't. When I was growing up, the biggest news story I remember is the two kids who killed their sexually abusive father.

Just remember, as the rest have said. There is a fine line between completely smothered, and protective. Protective is proactive, teaching our children how to handle any situation we can possibly imagine.


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Jodi - posted on 04/24/2013




In addition to what the other ladies have said, the world today is no worse than it ever was. you just hear about it more because of the 24/7 media. If anything, your children are safer now than they ever were because of technological intervention. I find it truly sad when parents believe their children are growing up in a world with greater crime than they did, because it simply isn't the case.

Denikka - posted on 04/23/2013




I think it's always bad to be over protective. But like Kelly said, there's a line between *over protective* and just protective.
I think it's much more important to provide your children with their own protection rather than shelter them from every evil in the world. Bad things are going to happen. There's nothing you can do about that. But what you can do is provide your child with the best tools possible to protect themselves from harm. And the most effective way to stop a predator for instance is to have a child who is secure and confident and understands the boundaries about their body. That alone can work in most situations, from child to adult, to avoid predators-child molesters to rapists or abusers.
A confident child is not a target. A scared child is. Just as a confident person walking down the street is substantially less likely to be mugged. Why go after the difficult target when there are so many easy victims out there. It's actually recommended that you look people in the eye and smile when in a potentially dangerous situation (walking down the street late at night, etc). For crimes of opportunity (like mugging), a perpatrator is less likely to target someone they have made a connection with. Not to mention that you have now seen their face and could ID them.
A child predator wants a child who will do what they want. A child who won't tell on them, who will essentially help them get away with what they're doing. A confident child with firm body boundaries will not be that victim.

Raise your kids to be confident in themselves. Teach them that their body is their own. Teach them that no matter what, they can trust you. And teach them to be proactive about their own safety. Many children (and adults) have been saved by just knowing what to do in case something does happen.

You can't raise your child thinking that the boogeyman is around every single corner. But let them know that there are bad people out there and, just in case, there are things they can do to protect themselves.
Just remember...most child predators are not the stranger you see passing you in the mall. They're family, close friends, teachers, coaches...people in positions of authority and trust around your child. The last people on Earth that you would believe could do something like that.

[deleted account]

I think there is a fine line between "over protective" and "protective".

I agree with Amy, the crime has always been there, we just have more access to knowing about it now. I do feel we should use that information to protect ourselves and our children, and to teach them to protect themselves. That said, I do limit J's exposure to the news. While I don't allow him to watch it directly, I do make him aware of what is going on in our world--I feel he needs to know what is out there, but I put it into terms that he can understand, and explain it in a way that he is not emotionally affected, but rather intellectually stimulated.

I am somewhat over-protective because I grew up in a situation where I had no security, thus I am compelled to provide an abundance of it for my son. I try to protect him from the sidelines, so to speak. I provide a safe environment for him to take risks in, then allow the risks. I teach him why the environment I am allowing him into is safe, and why I would not allow him to take the same risks in other environments.

ETA: (Sorry, I thought I typed this paragraph, but apparently, I only thought it)
Also, knowing that I am compelled to be over-protective of my son, I am usually able to stand back from a given situation and think "Am I protecting him, or am I protecting AND teaching him?" If I am only protecting him, I need to reanalyze what I am doing and add a teaching component. If there is a situation in which I feel *I* need to protect him, then I also need to be teaching him how to protect himself because I will not always be there. Unfortunately, sometimes that requires me to take risks that are scary for me. For example, today I will be allowing my 8 year old to ride to a friend's house on his bike after school for the first time. Our neighborhood is gated, we employ security guards, I know my neighbors, there are no busy streets, and he has demonstrated that he knows how to obey traffic laws and be aware of his surroundings, he also knows not to get into a car or go into anyone's home (except for the friend he is visiting). I know I need to let him go--I sure as hell don't want to, but I'm going to. I have to. because one day he will be in a car, and if he's never left my side, he won't know how to handle himself when he does--baby steps.

Amy - posted on 04/23/2013




Perverts have always been there now it's just much more in your face because the media can get the news to you so much quicker and on so many different outlets. I just limit the amount of news I expose myself too, for instance I can not watch the new don television because I don't want my 7 year old to hear or see something that is going to worry him.

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