Ex still wants Child support and us to buy all the clothes

Susan - posted on 11/16/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )




We have a blended family. Even though his ex gets support from him, she will still ask us to buy clothes for them all the time. The problem I have is,then when they come to visit they are wearing no jackets, short sleeves( in the winter ) and stuff with holes in them. Im embrassed to take them out!!!When I tell my husband what WE buy needs to stay at our house, he thinks thats wrong. I would like them to have clothes just for our house only...is that wrong???? I just bought them alot of clothes for Christmas, and now that I know Ill never see them in the clothes again, just burns me up!!!


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Leeanne - posted on 11/18/2012




We had same problem when his girls where younger. The came to us dressed as tramps and left looking a million dollars. In the end up we kept the clothes at ours and sent them home with what they came in. At this point it cracked me up as his ex made more money than us!!

Deanna - posted on 11/16/2012




Maybe she is sending them over in play clothes. I never thought about it but I send my son over in play clothes, his father and girlfriend probably think I am being mean.

Danielle Kimberly - posted on 11/16/2012




I agree with Jodi. I was with someone for 3 years who had a child from a previous relationship and that's what we did. She was paid child support each month, she lived with her parents and we had the LO for equal amounts each week (we had him Tuesdays, Thursdays and every other weekend), but he always showed up "poorly" dressed and the mother was always looking for us to buy the major necessities (winter jacket, boots etc..). I worked at a very nice children's clothing store and was lucky to get 50% off clothing. At first I didn't mind sending the LO back to his mother's in "good" clothing. But as time went on, I noticed I hadn't seen a lot of the clothes I bought him and all we had was his "grungy" wear.

If the LOs are showing up in clothes that should be thrown out or lack of, maybe you can buy gently used clothing at a much lower cost that could go back to the mother's and you guys keep the nicer clothing at your home. Maybe you have friends with hand me downs or something that is better than what the LOs are showing up in. It may sound mean but it's really not. Good luck. Stand your ground and I hope your husband agrees with you soon!

Jodi - posted on 11/16/2012




You're not wrong. We do that here. We always have clothes at our house for my step son, and we send him home in the clothes he came in, that way the clothes stay here.

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