Exchange student bullying my own child, 17 vs 11

Holly - posted on 03/28/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )




I am ready to send this student packing, as this isn't the first time he's hurt my son. But I want this to be the last time. He has caused him injury, spraining his wrist. Before, he has scratched him until bleeding, held him to the ground, left him hurt in our trampoline, stuff I thought was just roughhousing; altho my son is teasing him a little, I don't think physical violence from someone double his size and strength is a fair or appropriate response - it's bullying. The student responds immaturely and he doesn't even apologize. We are talking to his coordinator to find him a new host family, one with no younger kids in it, so he can finish his year. However, it is very awkward right now as my husband and I and my son are angry at him and I am not sure how to handle him. He is not my child, or he'd be held responsible for his actions (grounding, taking away computer/internet, bicycle, allowance, stuff like that). How can I discipline someone else's kid until he's outta here?


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Holly - posted on 03/28/2013




I think what we are going to do is keep them seperated and not let them be alone together. He will be relocating to a new host family in a few days. We have tried hard to work with him on simple things like putting the bread back in the refrigerator, or putting our bicycle, that he uses, away when he comes back. We've taken the internet away for things like that, or not taken him someplace he wanted a ride to. He seemed to get the message and things were going smoothly but he was raised differently; we don't engage his arguments or tolerate physical altercations. I just don't know what I could use to appropriately punish him for these inappropriate reactions to an 11 year old.

Michelle - posted on 03/28/2013




I agree with Jodi. He is living in your house and for me that means he lives by your rules.

I would be grounding or taking away things for sure. Maybe he keeps doing it because he knows he will get away with it.

Jodi - posted on 03/28/2013




As long as he's under your roof and your care (you are essentially his guardian), you can absolutely discipline him by grounding, etc. Why do you feel you can't?

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