feeling overwhelmed.....

Cheyenne - posted on 09/27/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )




hi im 21 and i have a 20 month old and and another on the way in dec. lately ive been feeling trapped like i cant go or do anything without my son. im a stay at home mom while my bf works one full time job and one part time job. i guess i just need to vent because i dont feel its fair to me to be doing all the work for our son. i cook and feed him, do all our laundry, clean up after him, get up with him in the middle of the night, im awake with him if hes up until midnight. its always me. and i know i've had people tell me why dont i go to work and my bf stay home, but it wouldnt work. my bf CANNOT handle our son. he sleeps all the time and i have found my bf sleeping on the couch while hes supposed to be watching our son for 20 min while i take a shower or run to the store for milk. and he is a very heavy sleeper so he cant hear our son wake up. i have 1 good friend and thats all( im not joking). i had 2 other friends but i couldnt handle them blowing me off or not wanting to talk to me when i needed them. we live with my bf parents and they both work full time as well so im pretty much here by myself unless my bf is sleeping from working graveyards. i occasionally get to take the car to my moms house for a few hours but thats about it or if my son has a doc appt. im just feeloing really trapped and helpless. its a dificlt situation for me because my bf does work and he needs the gas to go to work everyday( 60 miles to and from work) so there will be times where i wont even leave the house for a week at a time. ive kinda stoped wanting to make new friends because i dont se the point if i cant even get out of the house and take my car somewhere without my bf permission. and with a new baby coming into the pic im worried things between me and my bf will get even worse. and i wont be able to handle 2 kids by myself. if anyone has gone through this please help. and i was in couseling but i had to stop because my bf didnt think i needed it so i stopped so we wouldnt break up.

and ladies, if you dont have anything nice to say about this then i would suggest dont reply. i have enough problems and i dont need to deal with aruging to someone i dont even know.


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Connie - posted on 09/27/2011




I was you once lol although it seems like a lifetime ago now. first of all, take some time for you. read a book, take a long hot shower and if your son wakes and cries but you know he is safe let him cry while you finish. I know it is hard and it seems unfair but you have to take care of you to be able to take care of him and it will not hurt him. go for a walk during the day and get some sunshine, being out in the fresh air getting some exercise will help your mood immensely. make sure you are eating good and taking your vitamins and if your son lays down for a nap, take one yourself. cut yourself some slack, you are doing a good job. find things that allow you to play with your son and enjoy him. they grow more quickly then you can imagine. feel free to message me anytime. good luck and God bless!

Elfrieda - posted on 09/27/2011




That sounds terrible! I would feel the same way. Is there really nowhere within walking distance? No buses?

I find that I need to get outside with my 21 month old EVERY day or else we both have a miserable day. Maybe even taking a walk to a safe place with him in the stroller, and then letting him out to poke sticks in a puddle, will make both of your days go better. I'm a huge believer in the power of the sun to wake you up and make you more cheerful. Even on cloudy days, just the fresh air helps.

Maybe if you go for your walk at the same time every day and give smiles to the people you pass, you'll make a friend that is close to your house.

I don't know what else to tell you. I hope you find a way to feel better.

JuLeah - posted on 09/27/2011




If I were you I'd be feeling overhwlemed, loney, beyond tired and plotting my escape.

To stop counseling so your relationship doesn't end is a bit of a red flag ... I mean, he wants you to be all you can be, be happy, fully be the person you are meant to be, be strong, laugh, fullfill your dreams and all of that, right?

Sounds like he is tired too - and frightened - overwhelmed

But, back to you. Good on ya for reaching out - stay connected ... get out of the house for walks even if you have no real place to go - the fresh air, the sun light ... all good. Make sure you focus on sleep - when your child naps, you sleep too- you are sleeping for two after all

Eat fresh foods, not processed. Give your body every chance. Drink a lot of water.

Can you join a near by gym? They often have day care.

I get that money is tight, but you can't put a price on sanity

Any woman in your shoes would feel as you feel ...

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