Feeling Robbed!!!!

Jo - posted on 01/11/2011 ( 9 moms have responded )





Just wondering if anyone else has been through this and feels the way I do. Im 25 and have had 2 c-sections. My son was an emergency c section as I developed HELLP Syndrome and so nearly died. My daughter was a c section as well as the hospital worried that I would get HELLP again if I didnt deliver. So the chances of me ever having a natural birth are slim to none and I find that very upsetting. I feel I have been robbed of my chance to go through one of the most natural events in the world. I know that I have made it through with 2 beautiful children but I still do have these feelings.

Please I would love to hear from anyone who has felt this way and how you dealt with it. Thanks


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User - posted on 05/11/2011




I had 5 c-sections and had Placenta Percreta which is the rarest and deadliest of the accreta conditions. i had to have a hysterectomy and believe me even though i have 5 children i feel robbed. All i can say is find support from family, friends or a group. I am pasting a link to a news story that was done about me and the condition. i hope it is helpful.http://abcnews.go.com/Health/caesarian-r...

Christy - posted on 01/12/2011




I had 2 C sections, too. Don't feel robbed. Think of it this way. If you had your babies 100 years ago, you wouldn't have made it through, and probably not your kids, either. Technology has come so far now and you were blessed with 2 children and survived. Robbery would have been you and your babies passing away.

Louise - posted on 01/12/2011




I know how you feel. I had two children naturally and after 15 years decided to have another. The birth was a nightmare and ended up in an emergency c section. I felt robbed and cheated of those first precious hours after her birth that I was out cold from the anethetic. Not being able to feed her because I was restricted to the bed with a catherter. Not a pleasant experience and not what I had expected. My advice to you is try and look forward because looking back will only make you feel angry and cheated. If you should go on to have more children ask the health care experts if there was any way you could try and have a natural birth. Tell them how important it is to you. At the end of the day though you have healthy children and they have a healthy mother!

Peita - posted on 01/11/2011




I feel robbed, but for different reasons, I had 3 vaginal deliveries, but nome of them were what I would call natural! My first was a 38hr labour with an epesiotomy and forceps delivery as his head got stuck! My 2nd was a 6hr labour, but during labour, my blood pressure shot up to 190/120 and everyone was rushing about trying to bring that down, after I delivered my baby, the doctor realised that I had something called Placenta Accreta, my placenta was attatched to the uterus and I was rushed to surgery, I had a 2 Unit blood transfusion plus other fluids and was sent to recovery, my 3rd baby, everything went wrong :-(, I had all day nausea for 18 weeks, at 28 weeks I started swelling, at 30 weeks, I was told to give up work and be on complete bed rest for high blood pressure, at 32 weeks, I was medicated for my BP, at 37 weeks the protein in my Urine started, I was induced just after 37 weeks for pre-eclampsia, I had a 1 hr 15min labour and delivered fine, after I gave birth, it was discovered I had Placenta Increta, my placenta had grown though the lining of my uterus and grown into my fundus, I ended up with an emergency hysterectomy, 9 units of blood, plus many, many more fluids, a clamp on my right femoral artery (this was when the hospital told my husband to ring my family as they didn't know if I was going to survive), 3 operations, a 4 1/2 day stay in ICU and well, it was just crap, these complications I had usually happen in women who have had previous c-sections, I had never had any!! I feel cheated that I wasn't able to enjoy my babies after I had them as I was too busy getting better, I feel cheated that I couldn't breastfeed with my last 2 because of fluid loss, it was just crap.... After saying all that, I love my kids to bits and now wouldn't change anything, especially if it meant missing out on one of them... I still ask myself all the time 'why me', but I know I was just EXTREMELY unlucky and have learn't to deal with it....I guess what I am trying to say is that vaginal births don't always end well either, I hope you feel better soon :-)

[deleted account]

I have also had 2 c-sections. I did want to try vaginal birth, but when I found out that my first pregnancy was twins then I knew there was a very real chance that I would only ever have c-sections (VBAC isn't available where I live).

I do feel slightly disappointed that I will never experience vaginal birth, but in the grand scheme of things the only thing that really matters is that I have 3 healthy, happy kids who all arrived here safely. Method of delivery isn't nearly as important as the outcome.

I know I don't feel the same as you, but wanted to post as encouragement anyway.

Andrea - posted on 01/11/2011




I feel robbed! After my emergency c-section with my twin boys I wasn't able to see them until the next day. I was also put to sleep during the surgery and my husband was not allowed in the OR. We were not able to greet our boys as they came into the world!

Tyrae - posted on 01/11/2011




I do feel robbed out of my natural birth, my daughter was in a frank breech position so in order to make sure she came out as healthy and safely as possible I ended up having a c-section after 9 hours of labor. I cried for a good hour after I made the decision to have a c-section while I waited for the OR to get ready for me. I've learned to live with the fact that even though I didn't get what I had wanted my whole pregnancy, a natural birth, with no pain relievers, I know that I did the best I could in order to insure my daughter started her life out as healthy as she could be. I've started refering to my scar as my "battle wound", the battle for my daughter. If I do have another child I will be trying for a VBAC but there is always the possibility that the next baby will be breech also, it could have something to do with how my uterus sits, or she could have just hated being head down, who knows.

Amy - posted on 01/11/2011




I've had a C-section. I don't feel robbed, natural birth just wasn't in the cards for me. I always joke with my husband that I really didn't want to do all the pushing away. Yes it takes longer to heal, and is painful. My recovery was 4 months long (complications and infection). But i know when we go to have baby #2 I'll have to do it all over again, and I'll know what to expect. I'm fine with it, a baby is worth it all.

Lakisha - posted on 01/11/2011




im sorry i have never had a c section. but i think its always something we all feel like we are missing out on. so i know this probally wont help alot but you know how no matter what it seems like we wish we could change places with some one else's expierence.. hey i wish i could have no strectch marks why did i have to have the terrible stomach and some moms dont have a mark...

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