Good idea or presumptuous?

Shannon - posted on 05/07/2010 ( 21 moms have responded )




In the planning of my son's 2nd birthday I decided that stores should do birthday registries. How often do you have people ask you what does he want? What does he need? That would solve that problem perfectly. Well upon further investigation I discovered that Toys R Us, Target, Walmart, and Sears all do this to a degree. There may be more but I haven't looked anywhere else. Toys R Us, Walmart, and Target have wish lists you can create that can be viewed by friends and family and Sears looks like you can actually make a registry for birthdays. I think this is wonderful and have contemplated making one but haven't because I fear others would see it a presuptuous. I would like to know what other mommies think please? Thank you!

Also check out this community!!!
Mommies in their late 20's to mid 30's (expecting-toddlers) on Circle of Moms


Sharon - posted on 05/07/2010




That's tacky.

I'm sorry, I have a hard enough time getting people to respond to the RSVP portion of the invitation, nevermind, them going to a specific store and looking up my childs' wish list.

My invitations always say "no gifts please". We always wind up with gifts anyway. Our kids get more than enough toys from close friends & family. Its never any bother for me to answer close familys' questions of "what is he into these days?"

Honestly, between wedding invitations, baby showers, welcome baby parties, bridal showers, I get more than enough wish lists and honest to god the shit asked for is sometimes more than a bit tacky.

The day i get an invitation with a gift registry is the day I call some mother to give her the what for in expecting a gift.

This conversation has been closed to further comments


View replies by

Keri - posted on 03/06/2013




I think it is a great idea for family and maybe close friends, but for most people I think they would find it presumptuous. I have done a couple for my son mostly for his father whom he does not see.

Robynn - posted on 03/06/2013




My sister-in-law says she's seen birthday registries in Calgary. I think it would be a great idea! But usually I just put a few suggestions on the invitation for what my kids would like. But a registry would be nice too.

Shannon - posted on 05/09/2010




I would just like to clarify a couple points. It would not be included in the invite, especially since they have already been sent, and he's going to be two the only ppl invited are family and close friends which we have alot of. I would not expect ppl to buy off the list I would just use it as a point of reference for ppl to see what kinds of things he is interested in.

[deleted account]

ahhh no good, we always put no gifts as well.. if i got in an invite with that in it i wouldnt be impressed.. and i def wouldnt look at the registry.. no one likes registries really lol.. well i dont

Katherine - posted on 05/09/2010




I have thought about that, but was torn , like you. Sometimes I want to write no gifts, CD's only or something.

[deleted account]

i think it is a good idea, as long as you pick things from different price points so everyone can get something. it's hard to shop for kids because you never know what they will want or what they already have and it would just make it easier

[deleted account]

Geez....that would save me tons of time between emails, phone calls and repeating myself over and over again but then also takes out the spontan ideas some people have while shopping.

Nyssa - posted on 05/09/2010




That would maybe help my MIL. I have 5 boys, so most of the things they have they share, and get passed down to one another. But, everytime a birthday comes around she is asking what to get them. I don't even know what to get them half the time. LOL They don't really need anything since everything is pretty much shared. Well, besides clothes, they do have a tendency to wear out the pants pretty easily, but I don't think she wants to give clothes. For those that are saying it is tacky...well, yeah I think it would be tacky to give to your child's friends that are being invited to a party, but a great idea for family. It would just be ideas for a gift. I wouldn't really expect my children to get what was on the list. Let's face it, I'll probably never do a registry, but it sounds fun to let them go thru and do it. My oldest boys anyway.

Diane - posted on 05/09/2010




I am a firm believer in buying from the registry for weddings and baby showers but I would never do it for a birthday. I'm sure some would appreciate it but I think it might be a bit far. My kids have always gotten a couple things for birthdays and Christmas that were really awesome that I had never seen before and if there was a registry then they may have missed out on some of those things.

Jessica - posted on 05/08/2010




I don't think it's tacky. You don't have to put it on the invitation! There's nothing wrong with making one in case someone asks. They don't HAVE to get anything and most people know that, but they do anyways cuz it's fun to shop for kids! I don't know about yall, but my daughter isn't spoiled and she doesn't have a lot of toys. When someone wants to buy her something, I usually tell them several times they don't have to do it, but they do anyway and it's greatly appreciated b/c we can't afford to buy her toys. Her birthday is in a few weeks, I'm not sure if I'm going to create a wishlist or anything, but I have a HUGE extended family and we're all close, so it would be much easier to say "look at" or something in a text or fb msg if they ask.

Keri - posted on 05/08/2010




Walmart has a wish list and target has a list. You can create and account and give the link on the birthday invitations.

[deleted account]

lol - that had never crossed my mind but it would have made life easier when buying for my goddaughter when I wasnt always aware of what she had, what she needed and what she wanted.

Renee - posted on 05/08/2010




I have to agree with Sharon and a couple others above here, I'm the mother of 2 children now 9 and 11 years old. I always wrote "no gifts please" and people always came bearing gifts anyway. My kids got plenty from family, etc. even without a party. Just remember that at age and up they are going to think that party = gifts and in my opinion the gift is the party. Parties are expensive. I am a single mother and I don't throw parties anymore because frankly I would rather get the child a gift instead of spending $100 on the party, something they truly want and will appreciate and enjoy. If you can afford the party, wonderful, but it's tacky to expect gifts and even tackier if your child begins to expect them too.

Joanna - posted on 05/08/2010




I make an amazon wishlist and email it to only close friends/family if they ask what to get. With other friends/aquaintances, if they ask I just tell them that she likes books/coloring books, because then it's kind of easy for them to pick out a cheap $4 book and my daughter would always be happy with it.

Andrea - posted on 05/08/2010




A registry for a birthday is unnecessary. When people asked me what my son needed for his first birthday, I told them each person something different so he'd have a wide variety and those that didn't ask still got him wonderful gifts!

Charlie - posted on 05/08/2010




I agree , presents are nice but its not what i celebrate my sons party for , i think its a little tacky to be honest .

I always just ask people come to the party to celebrate and maybe bring a dish of food no presents are expected and they know that , if i were to ask for a gift it would be a donation to a charity in my sons name , we all know most 2 year olds have more than enough toys !

Jodi - posted on 05/08/2010




A birthday registry?? No way....sorry, but birthday parties shouldn't be about presents.

[deleted account]

Sorry, have to agree with Sharon here - I think it's tacky. Especially for a 2-year-old! It looks like putting all the emphasis on getting gifts.

Gwen - posted on 05/07/2010




Personally, I think it's presumptuous. Especially if you include the registry card in the invitations.

Now, if your brother said "What does the baby need for his birthday?" and you replied "I put together a list if you'd like a few suggestions." That would be okay. I avoid duplicates by primarily suggesting books and clothing. My daughter is also 2, and she really only needs so many toys.

Ashley - posted on 05/07/2010




I say why not. You get people asking all the time what dose he want for his birthday. Or can you write me a list. Now all you have to do is say go hear and check out his wish list. You have enough planning to do with out writing out 50 lists for everyone. Plus that way the chances of repeat presents are lowered. I think go for it. If it doesnt work for you, dont do it again.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms