Grandmother that won't listen

Michele - posted on 11/04/2015 ( 2 moms have responded )




I'm really struggling with my mom and need advice on how to handle the situation. My mother has an opinion about everything. She was never warm or very affectionate growing up totally the opposite of how I am with my 5 month old. She constantly tries to take the baby from my arms when we go over to visit. If the baby is crying she refuses to give her to me for 10+ minutes at a time (once she gives her to me the baby stops crying), doesn't respect or listen to me or my husband when it comes to safety like putting a twin size sheet on a pack and play mattress when I brought over the appropriate sheet. She constantly criticizes me rocking our baby to sleep every night when I'm the mother and its my choice. Her and my dad feel they should see the baby 3+ times a week when they already see her one time a week. For safety reasons we have opted to not allow my mother to watch the baby while we are at work and have another caregiver. I've tried many times to sit and talk with her and explain our views and she just yells, fights and creates drama instead of changing her action. Short of keeping my daughter from her nothing will get her to listen and frankly its ruining any relationship we did have. Anyone out there dealing with an overbearing crazy mom/grandmother and how did you handle it? What do you do when they still don't respect your wishes?


Dove - posted on 11/04/2015




I haven't been in that situation as both of my parents and my stepmom have complete respect for me as the mother of my children, but if they didn't... we wouldn't be visiting w/ them.

You've already tried talking to her, so the next logical step is to limit your interactions w/ her. Let her know that she had her chance to raise her children and now it is your turn. She is welcome to her opinions, but when they interfere w/ your choices for your child... she's crossing a line that should not be crossed and if she insists on crossing that line then you have no choice, but to limit her interactions w/ you and the child.


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Raye - posted on 11/04/2015




I agree. You need to tell it to her straight.... your child, your decisions. Let her know you will gladly listen to her advice, but the final say is yours. If she can't respect that, you have no choice but to not bring your child around her. Don't feel guilty about it, either. It would be her own fault for not respecting your wishes.

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