have i made the right decision?

Liana - posted on 01/13/2011 ( 8 moms have responded )




i had enrolled myself into tech to learn midwifery but this week my partner and i had discused me not going and instead staying home with our 1 year old daughter. I will be doing in home child care and eventually growing our little family. We have decided that I will return to tech after finishing having our kids so this may not be for another 6-10 years. Have I made the right decision in not going back? I am unsure


Laura - posted on 01/14/2011




Only you know what will work best for you and your family; there is no right or wrong decision here. There are pros and cons to each side of this issue. If you've weighed those points in discussing your future with your partner, then whatever was decided must be what seems to work in your situation.

If, however, you have reservations about waiting that long to attend school, then speak up! Decisions such as this can are not set in stone and can be revisited and changed! Your apparent hesitation indicates that you would rather go back to school sooner rather than later, which is perfectly okay. Communicate this with your partner and brainstorm to see if there are other options available to you that may satisfy everyone. As pointed out already, going to school when you have small children WILL be challenging, but it can work if that is what you want to do. Good luck to you!

Kate CP - posted on 01/14/2011




It's such a personal decision that I don't know if anyone else can tell you you're right or wrong. I CAN tell you that if you're having doubts then you should talk to your partner again and think this through more until you feel confident in your decision.

Louise - posted on 01/14/2011




I think it is very difficult to raise children and study at the same time due to pure time and energy. If you want another child then I think you are right to put off the study because you can not commit 100% of your time to it. I see nothing wrong with studying at home once your child is sleeping through the night and has established a routine that you could work with. I suppose it is up to the individual how much they can take on in one go. My daughter is now two and I am considering doing a degree at home in my free time as I know that she will be going to play group in 6 months time giving me even more time to dedicate to my studies.


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Jennifer - posted on 01/14/2011




if you are wanting to become a a certified nurse midwife, you'll need a bachelors in nursing (4 years) plus the 2 years of midwifery...if you go full time. i go to school part time (also going for certified nurse midwifery) and as nice as it would be to get school done as quickly as possible, i love going part time and being able to be home the rest of the time. it works out really well, as long as you manage your time. even though it seems like it is going to take me forever to get done with school, i love knowing that at least i'm getting somewhere with it because going to school full time is just not an option right now. my vote is to have another talk with your husband, and try to go part time...its so much less stressful than full time

Christy - posted on 01/14/2011




How long is the school? What days? I know it's hard to handle kids and school, but personally I wouldn't put it off if it's not that long (a year or 2 at the most anyway).

Katherine - posted on 01/13/2011




I went back to school when my daughter was 10mo. 6-10 years seems like an awfully long time. I don't know how old you are though. I think you SHOULD go back though. Maybe just start with a few classes. You could always do the online ones. If your husband is supportive I would definitely go for it!!!

Good luck.

Sammie - posted on 01/13/2011




I am a firm believer in studying while being at home, I have studied continuously since I fell pregnant, my daughter is now 19mo and I am due to have baby #2 in 4 weeks. I will not be going back to work until BOTH children are in school, so at least 4 years away. That said, I don't want to go back into the work force with nothing but "housewife" skills ( I am only 22). HOWEVER: Midwifery is something that would require you to be employed in the profession to maintain your skills and knowledge, which is fine, except you plan to have more children which = time off. Quite a substantial amount of time. If you intend to operate your own home childcare, will you REALISTICALLY have the time to work, look after baby and study? Is hubby worried some responsibility to look after baby will fall to him if you study again? If so, he needs to step up. Perhaps look into night classes?
I can't say if you have made the right or wrong decision, only you know that :) You just need to look at the reasons as to WHY you made your decision.
Best of luck! :)

Casey - posted on 01/13/2011




I've just had to make the same choice myself, my first child is 2 and I wanted to go back to studying or something this year but instead we are having another baby, we all have to make sacrifices in life especially when you become a parent but it's important not to forget about the things you want too. Have you looked into doing the course part time? or half from home have at the institution where the course is from? or is there other things you could do right now from home to prepared you for the course? it's important to do things for yourself as well other wise sometimes you start to resent being the stay at home mum so if you can do something from home or something part time while you are being a stay at home mum it might help you keep your sanity and might also help you in the future when your ready to get stuck into you new career, but if I were you I wouldn't completely put life on hold for the next 6-10 years I would ask around and see what you can do now.

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