Having a baby after 42

Monica - posted on 05/16/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




I am 42 & have 2 children aged 13 & 11. I am in a wonderful relationship where we have discussed possibly having a child together. I feel that I am too old. My Boyfriend & I were best friends for over 20 years & after our marriages fell apart, did we decide to get together. He has no children & the love for him that I have makes me want to have another child. I keep doing the Math & think of how old I will be when that child Graduates. I also have a fear of 'if the child will be ok'. Life now is good as both my kids are very independant. I just want to hear the challenges that I'm sure some are having. I know I will love this child the moment I feel them in my stomache. I loved being pregnant both times. I love being a Mom & have & still am very involved. Its just a great gift to give someone but I am still on the fence. Also how is it with Half Siblings & what could be the challenges?


Louise - posted on 05/17/2012




I have three kids all by my husband but with a huge age gap of 15 years between my sons and my daughter who is now 3.5. I have a 21 year old son an 18 year old son and my daughter. The age gap actually works really really well. I have built in baby sitters and my daughter has three father figures!

The pregnancy was not a walk in the park, I had a lot of problems maintaining a pregnancy due to an undiagnosed blood problem. After three miscarraiges one of which was triplets I had my daughter. (one of the side affects of being an older mum is multiple babies, as the ovaries tend to kick out more eggs closer to menopause)! Any way now she is here and although I am knackerd at the end of the day she keeps me young! It is like raising an only child so teddy bear tea parties, lego, jigsaws, painting you name it we do it.

I think if it is something you want to do then you need to chat to a consultant first so you go into things with your eyes wide open. I had a nucleal test at 12 weeks as I did not want to bring a baby into the world that potentially my sons would have to care for in adulthood. Bringing a downs baby into the family was not an option for me, although when I was having my sons I never had the tests as I would of coped. Having a baby at nearly 40 made me think of the future for that child. I hope to live to a ripe old age but if I dont who would care for her. I know that my sons would look after her if something catastrophic happend and that is very comforting.

As you know having a baby is long term. Somedays I do feel tied down again, but mostly she brings the whole family pleasure and I would not be without her.

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