Having a Second Baby over 40 - good or bad idea?


Ev - posted on 06/20/2016




I can not connect with the being 40 plus having kids but people are holding off until their late 30's to 40's to have families for the very reason to get stable in finances, have a descent home, etc. Five years ago, I went to a class reunion of my senior class. We have been out 25 years at that time. One guy who was one of the top football players at school had raised his family and was starting over at 44 with a new baby coming and had a grandchild too! So it is possible to have kids after 40 and it work out just fine. Even my ex husband became a new daddy at 40 and again at 42. The girls will be 18 when he is 58 and 60. I guess he and his wife are happy with it.

As for the worries about post partum depression and life being harder...that is just how it is. It happens no matter the age of the mother or her health. It just depends on the woman. And no one can foresee your future for you to know if you will suffer those things or not. As to being financially stable--a lot of people just are not but they make due with what they have. If you need to enlist help from friends, church, or other resources and they are out there if you hunt for them. I do not think it matters really what age you have a child, sometimes you are prepared for it and sometimes not. Look at all the teen girls that have babies. None of them are ever ready to become a mom at that age. I was 21 and I know a good part of me was not ready to become a mom for the first time. But I muddled through it and I had a husband too. On to the second child, I did not have my second until I was almost 29 because dad was not ready to do so too close in age. So our kids are 7 years apart. It was hard because I had not had a baby in so long and add to that a boy. I did not know what to do with a boy! But I learned.

As for terminating the pregnancy, it is really up to you if you feel circumstances are not right. But you do have other options open to you like adoption if you feel this is not the right time for you.

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