Having some MAJOR issues with my 3 1/2 yr. old.. HELP

Dana - posted on 01/09/2011 ( 1 mom has responded )




I am having some issues & I need some help or advice...

My son(whO is 3 1/2) is one of the sweetest boys Ive ever met, & he has a good nature (MOST of the time) but lately he's been acting like a crazy wildchild.... He doent listen to me or obey when I say something.... Ive tried yelling, popping his butt, time-outs, & Ive even started to throw out his toys when he's actin ugly to me..... NOTHING seems to stop him! I let him play with a friends son (theyre the same age) & he picked up quite a few bad behaviors from the kid.... He screams at me, throws stuff, & majorly acts out.... If he doesnt get his way, its like someone flipped a switch- he turns into a huge brat- screaming at me, kicking me, & he says he hates me....

I had hoped it was a phase, but its been 7 months now..... I dont know what to do anymore... Its gotten so bad that when I wake up every morning, I get a sense of dread... I am so exhausted dealing with this!

This morning, he dragged EVERY toy he has into the middle of his room... (He was in a pretty good mood so I figurd it wouldnt be too bad).... I asked him nicely to pick them up please, & he got right in my face, screamed NOOOOOO & tried to hit me!!!! I popped his butt & locked myself in the bathroom & cried my eyes out....

Im a single mom, so I dont get breaks... My only good friend is 6 months pregnant & shes on full bed-rest so I cant take him to her when I need a few minutes away.... I honestly dont know how much longer I can take this though. Ive talkd to his doctor, a therapist, & awoman who does evaluations on kids to see if they show signs of any disability & se said he shows signs of ADHD, but they cant treat that til the kid is 4. (which is 5 months away)

PLEASE, does anyone have any ideas, advice, or evensome support would be very much appreciated!!!!



Iridescent - posted on 01/09/2011




I know it's hard, but stop letting his behavior cause such a reaction in you. You are the adult, and all he's doing is manipulating you because he's learned that you allow it. You stay calm. You don't lock yourself in the bathroom. You be firm and enforce the rules. He won't pick up toys? Toys that aren't picked up all go into the garage until tomorrow. He wants to yell? You can't hear yelling, so can't respond. He wants to hit? He'll have to sit by himself with his nose in the corner - and I mean it, even if it requires you to stand right behind him and hold his nose in. When consequences are followed through, the kids learn they aren't optional. How much are you doing with him (playing WITH him?)? This is also very important. Also, if he's trying to injure you, he needs to be restrained. http://www.childbrain.com/pddq11.shtml The holding technique is very important for violent outbursts. The entire article is extremely important to learn. It works with all levels of development, ADHD, Autism, and typical children. We had difficulties when my oldest was young (2, 3 years) and he's Autistic. We were taught these things and they made a huge difference. Our children since have been easier as a result. Some are neurotypical, some are not.

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