Help! My son has been kicked out of 2 preschools!

Willow - posted on 02/11/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )




My 4yr old son is completely out of control. I am a single mother working full time job and going to school. I recently removed him from a nanny that was taking care of him in her home during the day (some evenings and overnights depending on my work demands) for the past 3yrs. He was hard to handle at home, but everyone kept telling me he was great for them and it was only because I was his mother. I felt like he wasn't getting the disipline and education he needed at the nanny's so I moved him to a preschool. He started hitting teachers and kids screaming and not following the rules on the first day (this is the way he behaves at home). One school kicked him out after a week and a half another after just one day! I don't know what to do he is going to be entering kidergarden next year and needs to be ready for school any advise?


Kelina - posted on 02/11/2012




I'd recommend getting him evaluated by a specialist just to make sure you're not dealing with any disorders and to get some ideas on how to deal with the behaviour. Acting that way at school is unacceptable, however, so is acting that way at home. IF and that's a big if, there is no bodily reason that he's acting this way, this is a learned behaviour. He's learnt that he can get away with it at home and it's going to be a long hard road to correct the behaviour. Try finding a preschool that will work with you to help correct the behaviour. Ask them ahead of time what their responses are to certain behaviours and start them at home. And also see if you can start him in the preschool on a part time basis to get him used to it, one or two days a week. That way he can gradually get used to it. Going from being number one with someones attention to competing with 30 other kids for attention is a huge adjustment. implicating the rules at home that the preschool has will help him adjust.


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Parenting class, a full work up at a pediatricians and maybe even interventional counseling for him.

Jane - posted on 02/11/2012




You definitely need to have him evaluated in order to rule out various problems. If the evaluation does turn something up, then that will give you ammunition to get him an IEP (Individual Education Plan) through the school district, to make accommodations so that he has a better chance at being successful in school.

I suspect he might have a problem such as ADHD, ODD or a sensory problem that means that the one-on-one care he got from the nanny was close to the ideal for him. He probably doesn't do well with a lot of noise or confusion around him. So get him evaluated by a psychologist and then go from there.

User - posted on 02/11/2012




It may be a security issue. Don't misunderstand me. I'm not suggesting you give up work, but if you don't work regular, set hours, he may be confused as to when he's going to see you, which will have an effect on his emotions and behaviour. Is it possible for you to work the same hours each week, so he has a clear routine of knowing when he's going to be with you?

Christy - posted on 02/11/2012




Can you get him evaluated by a DR to just to rule anything out?

My was placed in a special pre K program through the local school district at age 3 since his behavior was bad and he wasn't talking. He graduated to regular pre K in December and will start Kinder in the fall. He had to be evaluated by the school district and qualified for the Pre K program. Can you look into something like that?

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