HELP.... Unruly step daughter

Kayatta - posted on 08/27/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )




My 14 y/o step daughter is out of control. My step daughter have been with my husband and myself for the past 6 or 7 years. From the beginning my oldest has always given me/ us the most problems. She is lazy, rude, disrespectful and defiant. Last year my husband and myself were trying to put restrictions on her Iphone (that her grandmother bought w/out our knowledge) and she blew up. She fought her father because of this. And on yesterday we came in from church and I told her to do her chore (that she neglected to do for the past 2 days). She got really smart motuh with me so I told my husband, her dad to tell her because I am tired of being disrespected. So he went to talk to her at the kitchen table and when he told her to look at him when he was talkign to her, she immediately got up and was visibilly angry. Keep in mind we have other children in the home (2, 5 &10). Then she just lunged at her daddy and began to fight him. It took my mom and myself to break it up. Her dad never hit her, but he did restrain her from hitting him anymore. After my mom got her and was talking to her, she swung over my mom head to hit her dad again. I know that she did have a rough childhood when she was with her mom but this does not give any excuses for her behavior. I work in the mental health field with kids like this all of the time and I think that I have convienced her dad to get her some help. Because her behavior is gradually getting worst. When I fight moved here she fought me, got into a fight with her mother, picked up my 5 yr. old and slammed her on her head and fought her dad 2x's. Honestly I am tired. I am willing to leave my marriage to rid myself of this headache. I have tried everything suggested to me by several therapist and psychologist. I have tried to explain to her that her behavior will hinder her in the future. And it isn't healthy to a child to act this way. HELP if you have any siggestions.


Michelle - posted on 08/27/2012




Get her into counseling sounds like she is dealing with more anger than any 14 year old should maybe even some family counseling might help this dynamic. Don't walk away just because she isn't biologically yours do whatever it takes to help her, because she is a child who has lost her way and needs professional help to become the amazing person that I am sure you know is inside.

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