Help! Where did my two-year-old go?

Mary Renee - posted on 08/04/2012 ( 3 moms have responded )




I'm looking for advice from Mommies with older toddlers/preschoolers.

My adorable funny happy resilient two-year-old's behavior has changed literally overnight (and it just happened to be same day I had an interview and got a job).

She literally cries when she wakes up, cries when she goes to bed, and fights everything. She asks for juice and then yells "No Juice!" and throws it across the floor and then cries like it's the worst thing ever. I'll put her in panties and she wants a diaper, so I'll put her in a diaper and she'll want panties, and then she wants neither and is naked and doesn't want that either and just cries until we succeed in distracted her since it seems no choice will satisfy her.

She wants to play but she throws a fit if she wants Mommy in the room, and not daddy, or daddy in the room, but not mommy, and bedtime has become a nightly struggle that requires physical force jut to put a diaper and pajamas on her. I feel like I just have to ignore her crying and go on with our bed time routine as if it's business as usual because I'm not going to let her stay up all night and I don't know what else to do.

I understand a lot of changes are going on - I'm going to start to go back to work part-time, we've been dabbling in potty training, she's weaning her self (I'm not forcing it) and she's also started sleeping in her toddler bed (again, her own choice) instead of co-sleeping - but this behavior is so different, I have never heard her cry like this, as if someone is physically hurting her. The only discipline I ever used before was a time out and after 2-3 minutes she would give me a hug and say "Sorry Mommy" every time. But now I don't know what to do because this seems like less of discipline problem than an emotional one. There are points in the day where she's still herself, delighting in a dog's bark, singing songs, snuggling with me, having conversations and asking questions.

Suggestions!? Help! Is this a phase? Is this just the "terrible twos" or is it something else? What is the best was to respond?

p.s. her actual age is 27 months, as her birthday is May 5th 2010


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Medic - posted on 08/04/2012




My 30 month old girl started this shortly after she turned 2 and it is just now starting to get better.

Jaime - posted on 08/04/2012




My son is 3.5 and he's been going through this phase...sounds like she just caught it early on. With all of the changes, that is likely what is escalating the tantrums, but overall I don't think it's anything to worry about. Just be consistent and try to keep your cool (although that is a chore in least it has been for me). I hope things settle down for you soon. My son seems to be more calm the last couple of weeks but before that it was a couple of months of this sort of thing.

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