How do you deal with uncompromising or difficult in laws during holidays?

Nikki - posted on 11/05/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )




My husband and I have been wanting to have Christmas day this year to ourselves. We go to all other holiday events, but would like this day for us, especially since he works a lot and we don't want to go out at all that day. His parents are very traditional and anytime we have asked to come at a later time or do a different day there is a meltdown by his mother. We once wanted to go on vacation on my daughters birthday, since it was only weekend my husband had off work, and she flipped out saying it was "her day." We were planning on asking if we could do a different weekend or she could even have a party at her house if she wanted to or come to our house another day, but she had such a meltdown at the suggestion that my husband just left, and she ignored him for weeks. The gathering on Christmas is at his grandparents which is an hour away and to be honest a very stuffy environment. How would you deal with a situation like this?


Guest - posted on 11/06/2014




We compromise....

If I were in your shoes, I would ask your husband if he could take an additional day off after Christmas, and ask Mom-in-Law if she could serve a later Christmas Supper around 5pm instead of the traditional mid-day Christmas Dinner.

It doesn't have to be Christmas for you to stay home all day, but if his mom is trying to get everyone if the family together at once (which becomes more and more important to mothers as they age and become grandmothers) Christmas Day may be her only option because almost everyone has that day off work and they don't usually have other important commitments for that day. This way, you can have most of Christmas Day at home, and still have another full day to sit at home with just your nuclear family.

Most of all, keep in mind that Christmas should be mostly about family, not having time to play with toys or hulling up at home by yourself. You can do those things any day of the year, but it may only be possible to see many members of your family during the holiday.

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